Suicide

[ShaMan]

Dear Friends,

The tragic death of Celebrity Robin Williams has put a spotlight on the subject of mental illness which leads to suicide. Sadly, in the United States alone, it is estimated that one person commits suicide every 12 - 15 minutes. The recent decision to spend $75M on the Golden Gate Bridge suicide deterrent netting, and the climbing rate of death due to suicide are indicators that certain members of our society may be facing a potential epidemic of hopelessness. I myself have battled with boughts of what I would call (and could be clinically labeled) severe depression, even to the point of planning my own demise down to the last fatal detail. Thankfully I have a good mind, and I’m versed in cognitive regression therapy, and so I have been able to stay alert to my moods and overall mental state, keeping myself, as it were, away from the real potential that I may follow-through with some deadly plan.

In past posts I have alluded to an event from my childhood where my mother committed suicide. I was 14 years old when I came home from 8th grade class to find my mother drowned in the bathtub. I’ll spare you the details of her plot (I don’t want to give anybody a method plan), but it is suffice to say that she was indeed very serious about her intent (obviously). At that age I was not prepared for such a loss, and looking back I can say that many of the indicators of potential danger were present. Even before my mother carried out her plan, I myself was dealing with some teenage depression issues, and I had even considered suicide with no genuine intent on following-through other than the occasional thought that “others will be better off without me here”. My mother’s death, and the manner in which it occurred, put a stamp on me at that still impressionable age, and it solidified in me an intent to never do such a thing myself, and it gave me a deep compassion for people who are suffering from mental illness and depression.

Yesterday was hard for me. Not because it reminded me of something I can never forget anyway, nor because I feel a sense of loss once more. Yesterday, and today for that matter, are hard for me because the elephant in the room is now the fact that there are thousands of hurting people on the precipice of suicide, and there is very little I can do to help those individuals who are in such pain. For me, this tragedy is all to familiar, and today my compassion for those who are suffering is engulfing my thoughts and feelings. I can’t help but consider the thousands of nameless, faceless people who’s deaths may be preventable, and how I may help them. If you or someone you know is hurting in this way PLEASE contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Someone is available to talk 24/7.

Signed,

A Son

[Jenny A]

I suffer from depression periodically and I've passed that on to one child. It's often hereditary, and I'm pretty sure I know where I got it from. I've never attempted suicide, but by the time I've wanted too, I was too depressed to make that much effort. The vast majority of the time life is good. But then there are these periods in which it's a dull movie about someone else, or it hurts, one or the other.

It's very important to seek treatment for the depressed, because they may be too depressed to do it themselves. It's also important to keep an eye on them. Suicide is often fatal. Removing some of the means is helpful.

Oh, and one of my most important duties to loved ones is to assure them that my depression isn't caused by them, or even because I am not loved enough.

[Jacob(smooth)]

Thanks for sharing ShaMan.

[StuW]

My Daughter does a lot of work and fundraising for Mind which is a UK charity for mental illness. She is a big Robin Willliams fan and made this...

[vorlon13]

As I was coming up on joining 12 Steppers, I was in desperate struggle. I was convinced alcohol was helping me, and it was the magnitude of my problems that was overwhelming it.

Just thinking about stopping drinking was awful, because without the booze, I would be totally vulnerable to everything, it could not protect me at all if I quit.

Suicide did not look easy, it did not look easy at all, but it did look more feasible than even attempting to go sober.

28 years has proven otherwise.

[Jackalope]

@OP - thanks for sharing, it's a subject that is very near to me. My own mother nearly completed suicide when I was 17.

Like Robin Williams did, I also suffer from bipolar disorder (though in my case it is co-morbid with PTSD).

The suicide completion statistics for those afflicted by BD are staggering: depending on the source, it's estimated that between one in five to one in three afflicted with BD will complete suicide, and a great many more will attempt. Compared to the rate for the general population, or even compared to the population of depression sufferers, it's a very sobering figure.

I have personally struggled with suicidal thoughts and ideation for decades. It's not something that's easy to live with, even when you're determined not to.

[Jenny A]

@OP - thanks for sharing, it's a subject that is very near to me. My own mother nearly completed suicide when I was 17.

Like Robin Williams did, I also suffer from bipolar disorder (though in my case it is co-morbid with PTSD).

The suicide completion statistics for those afflicted by BD are staggering: depending on the source, it's estimated that between one in five to one in three afflicted with BD will complete suicide, and a great many more will attempt. Compared to the rate for the general population, or even compared to the population of depression sufferers, it's a very sobering figure.

I have personally struggled with suicidal thoughts and ideation for decades. It's not something that's easy to live with, even when you're determined not to.

Bipolar can be deadly. I've read the planning for a suicide is rarely more than a day. Often, it's less than an hour. Really depressed people rarely have the energy. BD's do. Make sure your loved one's know. I have a BD daughter and I don't leave her alone on the downswing.

[ShaMan]

I'm encouraged by the fairness and compassion in the responses to this thread. I especially appreciate everyone who remains vigilant in the midst of this elusive and misunderstood specter known as suicide. To all parents who struggle with depression, I humbly and compassionately offer my understanding and empathy, and to all others, including children (which we all are) I bid my sincere trust that there is hope beyond your despair.

[Jackalope]

Bipolar can be deadly. I've read the planning for a suicide is rarely more than a day. Often, it's less than an hour. Really depressed people rarely have the energy. BD's do.

Yeah. One of the things that many people don't get is how incredibly destructive the manic part of the cycle is, up to and leading to the downswing. What you've got then is an unstable person with no concept of consequences, often co-morbid with alcohol/cocaine/other substance abuse, who may be delusional and not capable of rational thought. That person may not have slept in a week, but has all the energy in the world. Charlie Sheen is a pretty well-known example.

Make sure your loved one's know. I have a BD daughter and I don't leave her alone on the downswing.

They all know, of course. I have a lot of people looking out for me. Fortunately I have been mostly asymptomatic for about three years now.

[CapnAwesome]

Suicide is awful and preventable. My extended family has had a shocking number of suicides in it due to mental illness. I've had two uncles, a grandparent and a great aunt all commit suicide in my lifetime. It's very sad and a constant worry for me because I know some of my siblings suffer from similar mental illness. Luckily for me I'm far to narcissistic to every consider such a thing.