How should I go about telling my parents that I'm atheist

[Metis]

I'd say keep mum until you're financially stable too. Why do you have to come out? Seriously, think about this. You can still drink coffee, jack off or whatever else you want to do so long as you're subtle. Why does everyone have to know if its going to endanger your position?

I'm gay and I didn't tell a soul online or in RL till I had a job and a place of my own (well, I guess the guy I was banging had some reasons to be suspicious). Nobody was really upset apart from my father and a few older relatives but I never felt a need to tell them, in fact I only did when a family friend asked would I be bringing +1 to their wedding.

Atheism doesn't call for martyrs, it doesn't ask anything. Just do what gets you by.

[emilynghiem]

Funny how atheism and homosexuality have this in common: Those that come out risk being cut off by their parents.

I think Dan Savage (awesome sex collumnist who hosts the podcast, Savage Love) gives good advice in these situations:

If you think there's a chance your parents will cut you off, stay in the closet until coming out of the closet doesn't potentially make you homeless or in dire straights. Once you are independent and can stand on your own two financial legs, coming out as an atheist will be a whole lot easier.

In addition I would use this as motivation to become independent quicker.
a lot of the cults take advantage of the dependency to force people to stay.
same with abusive domestic relations where the partner can't afford to leave
safely and take the kids.

You give me an idea, to organize a microlending fund for people going through this, whether for religious freedom or orientation conflicts or abuse issues.

why not organize a fund, such as through supporting atheists or universalists,
where if someone needs to break away sooner for college but can't afford living expenses, to set up a financial plan to lend the money until it can be paid back over time through summer or campus jobs, similar to student loans.

Even that student who sued her parents to make them pay for her college could have used help with a loan, while they worked out those personal conflicts.

I especially have a heart for rape victims who have trouble finishing school or keeping their jobs and households running after assaults that take years to recover from.

If every such group focuses on members in a specific situation, maybe this can be set up as part of peer counseling and support to resolve issues and get stabilized as soon as possible. I would love to see such a support network and microfund set up for atheists to help fellow atheists who might not feel right getting help from just anyone.

[Pyrrho]

I'd say keep mum until you're financially stable too. Why do you have to come out? Seriously, think about this. You can still drink coffee, jack off or whatever else you want to do so long as you're subtle. Why does everyone have to know if its going to endanger your position?

I'm gay and I didn't tell a soul online or in RL till I had a job and a place of my own (well, I guess the guy I was banging had some reasons to be suspicious). Nobody was really upset apart from my father and a few older relatives but I never felt a need to tell them, in fact I only did when a family friend asked would I be bringing +1 to their wedding.

Atheism doesn't call for martyrs, it doesn't ask anything. Just do what gets you by.

I agree. Why do you want to tell your parents anything? No one is entitled to know what you think. If you wish to tell them, tell them when you wish to tell them. But before you act, think carefully about the possible consequences of your actions. If you are financially dependent upon them, you should probably keep your mouth shut until that is no longer the case. Of course, you know your parents better than we do, so ultimately, you are in the best position to know if it is a good idea or not. But I say, if in doubt, keep your thoughts to yourself. No one else has a right to know what you are thinking.

As Metis says, atheism makes no demands on you. I have never told all of my relatives what I think. It is none of their goddamned business what I think. (If you will pardon the language.)