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Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
#11
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
I heard the knocking sound again. It was coming from the mirror.
I'm not anti-Christian. I'm anti-stupid.
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#12
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
I finally got fed up with religious groups condemning other denominations for teaching the Bible wrong, and started my own congregation for Atheists who could enjoy fellowship without religious conditions. Then I got a letter from American Atheists, telling me whatever I was doing, I was practicing Atheism wrong.
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#13
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
My girlfriend asked me to stop breathing so heavy. But I wasn't breathing heavy at all.
I'm not anti-Christian. I'm anti-stupid.
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#14
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
With some finality he swallowed the last of the 52 Ambien and signed the note. As his eyed slowly closed, he began to survey his life and in his mind there was only "Maybe."
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great

PM me your email address to join the Slack chat! I'll give you a taco(or five) if you join! --->There's an app and everything!<---
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#15
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
"What's that mama?", pointing to the plane.

"It's like a giant lobster.", said mama cannibal.
You make people miserable and there's nothing they can do about it, just like god.
-- Homer Simpson

God has no place within these walls, just as facts have no place within organized religion.
-- Superintendent Chalmers

Science is like a blabbermouth who ruins a movie by telling you how it ends. There are some things we don't want to know. Important things.
-- Ned Flanders

Once something's been approved by the government, it's no longer immoral.
-- The Rev Lovejoy
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#16
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
When his mother died, Harcourt didn't know whether to laugh or cry. He just kept scrubbing.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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#17
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
From John Lennon . . .

There were no flies on Frank. But there were on his wife, who'd been lying dead on the kitchen floor for 3 weeks.
There are no atheists in terrorist training camps.



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#18
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
The last Nazi on Earth looked in the mirror. He smashed it in disgust.
Comparing the Universal Oneness of All Life to Yo Mama since 2010.

[Image: harmlesskitchen.png]

I was born with the gift of laughter and a sense the world is mad.
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#19
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
Jane looked behind her and grinned maliciously as black blood oozed up from the ground to fill in the boy's footprints. Ahead, little Johnny saw nothing but flowers and sunshine, and he giggled.
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#20
RE: Two-Sentence Horror Stories: Post your favorite
I woke from drug-induced slumber and tried to focus my eyes on the hazy figure pressing me to the bed. "Hi, I'm Ken Ham," he said.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
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