Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 14, 2024, 3:01 am

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
#1
JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
It sucked; and not in a good way.

The end.
Reply
#2
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
One of the funniest things about the reaction to 50 shades of Grey (the book, no interest in movie) is the idea that it's somehow super edgy or something. I selectively read a few sex scenes and thought it was pretty vanilla.
[Image: dcep7c.jpg]
Reply
#3
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
Did you base this on the beaver shot scale?
I can't remember where this verse is from, I think it got removed from canon:

"I don't hang around with mostly men because I'm gay. It's because men are better than women. Better trained, better equipped...better. Just better! I'm not gay."

For context, this is the previous verse:

"Hi Jesus" -robvalue
Reply
#4
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
But evangelical fuckheads hate it. It must have some redeeming qualities.
Reply
#5
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
(February 19, 2015 at 4:40 pm)Minimalist Wrote: But evangelical fuckheads hate it. It must have some redeeming qualities.

They hate radical Muslims also, and they don't have any redeeming qualities.
[Image: dcep7c.jpg]
Reply
#6
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
I watched the film. It was actually quite boring, and despite not having read the book, it was obvious from the film that written by a moron ( apparently she insisted on not doing the changes to dialogue/plot that the director wanted).

I had hoped it would be funny in a so bad it's good way, but I only laughed a couple of times.

The sex scenes were dull.
Reply
#7
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
I won't be seeing this movie, possibly until I can pirate it and hate watch without paying for it. I have numerous moral, critical and kink objections to this series that prevents me from giving money to it. But I can't imagine that anyone could make that story end up good, and the reviews so far seem to bear that out.

If anyone wants a real kinky book to read, I've got one available on Amazon... Angel
"YOU take the hard look in the mirror. You are everything that is wrong with this world. The only thing important to you, is you." - ronedee

Want to see more of my writing? Check out my (safe for work!) site, Unprotected Sects!
Reply
#8
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
I suppose I should have clarified, my review was for the movie, not the book. Didn't read it. Ain't gonna after seeing the movie.

My GF and I wanted to see it on Valentines Day (Ok, she wanted to see it, but I was game), so we did. Went to a nice theater where you can order drinks and food. The audience was mostly uncomfortably silent, other than the occasional outburst of laughter at not funny parts. Yeah, good stuff.

The movie's biggest sin was, as others have said: it was not hot and it was boring. No chemistry between the actors and extremely dumb dialogue.

But, all that being said, my GF and I are still getting mileage out of making fun of the movie, so, it was money sorta well-spent-ish in that sense. I tease her now about my deserving punishments and so on. And "I want you in the play room! 15 minutes!". We work with what we gots.

It's not the worst movie of all time - there is Plan 9 from Outer Space, Santa Claus vs. the Martians and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes to contend with - but it's a right up there for a big budget feature. I'd probably still give the nod to Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. That was a true stinker. Stinky, stinky britches!
Reply
#9
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
(February 19, 2015 at 4:39 pm)CapnAwesome Wrote: One of the funniest things about the reaction to 50 shades of Grey (the book, no interest in movie) is the idea that it's somehow super edgy or something. I selectively read a few sex scenes and thought it was pretty vanilla.

I quite like vanilla, what's wrong with vanilla?



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








Reply
#10
RE: JHC's In depth review of Fifty Shades of Grey
(February 19, 2015 at 5:15 pm)downbeatplumb Wrote:
(February 19, 2015 at 4:39 pm)CapnAwesome Wrote: One of the funniest things about the reaction to 50 shades of Grey (the book, no interest in movie) is the idea that it's somehow super edgy or something. I selectively read a few sex scenes and thought it was pretty vanilla.

I quite like vanilla, what's wrong with vanilla?

Nothing is wrong with vanilla. However when someone promises you that you are going to get rocky road peanut better cup swirl and you end up with vanilla, it's disappointing.
[Image: dcep7c.jpg]
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Lord Of The Cops, 50 Shades of Bad Ass. Brian37 28 3031 October 15, 2020 at 7:13 am
Last Post: Gawdzilla Sama
  Book Review BrokenQuill92 17 3569 November 6, 2014 at 11:53 am
Last Post: AceBoogie
  Heathen Review #3: Diet Noah StealthySkeptic 1 1221 August 11, 2014 at 1:47 am
Last Post: StealthySkeptic
  Heathen Review #2: So Kawaii! StealthySkeptic 8 2723 July 23, 2014 at 5:57 pm
Last Post: StealthySkeptic
  Heathen Review #1: Apes Will Rise StealthySkeptic 16 3265 July 23, 2014 at 10:15 am
Last Post: StealthySkeptic
  Book review of "Night" everythingafter 3 2259 May 18, 2011 at 12:22 am
Last Post: Rev. Rye
  Review of The New Atheism: Taking a Stand for Science and Reason by Victor J. Stenger Justtristo 2 1697 December 11, 2010 at 6:19 am
Last Post: Justtristo
  Review: Kick-Ass (2010) Autumnlicious 9 2349 May 8, 2010 at 6:41 pm
Last Post: Tiberius



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)