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Current time: March 28, 2024, 5:51 pm

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What to say to Grandma?
#1
What to say to Grandma?
My grandma is very devoutly Catholic, and always has been. I don't think she knew I was an atheist until a month or so ago; we don't see each other very often, but we do get along well (as long as we don't talk politics or religion, haha).

Out of the blue, she's been sending me these emails. They were a lot of chain emails with "cute" or "inspirational" stories, all of which centered around god or Jesus. But just recently, they've become anti-atheist emails. Mostly, I just ignore them. The chain emails always go to me and several other people, but the anti-atheist emails are coming to just me. She sent me one this morning with a "funny" story about how all atheists are dumb assholes, and made a comment about how I probably wouldn't believe the story anyway. It felt pretty directly insulting, but I haven't said anything yet.

I'm debating on if/what I should say to my grandma. I love her dearly, but I've never challenged or criticized religion (let alone hers directly) in front of her, and when she's criticized atheism or my political or social beliefs I've always just let it go without a counterargument because I don't want to start something. But I'm getting really tired of it, especially since the emails are becoming more insulting towards atheists. I guarantee I've done more soul searching and more seeking answers from god that she has; I've done more searching for god than almost anyone else I know. (And, of course, my searching led me to atheism.)

My knee-jerk reaction this morning over the latest anti-atheist email was to fire back with criticisms on Catholicism and how, in my opinion, it's willful ignorance to ignore the laws of science in favor of beliefs that have been around since before mankind even understood that the moon wasn't a deity and the world was indeed round. I wanted to send her all sorts of quotes and articles and evidence of evolution (which was a theme of this morning's email) and how it's just as true as gravity, but I bit my tongue because I know she would not likely read any of it anyway.

What would you say to your grandma? Would you stand up to her and tell her to knock it off? I feel pretty certain that she views attacking my beliefs as her religious duty, but if I defend myself it'll just be seen as an evil attack and further fuel the idea of a war on religion she has in her head; she strongly feels Christians are more persecuted in America than minorities, non-heterosexuals, and transgenders combined.

How do I get her to back off without it being seen as me attacking her?
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#2
RE: What to say to Grandma?
"Grandma, you know I love you - but could you please stop spamming my inbox with all that bullshit?"
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#3
RE: What to say to Grandma?
(September 1, 2015 at 8:31 pm)cosmowanderer Wrote:



How do I get her to back off without it being seen as me attacking her?


Depending on your grandmother, that might be impossible.

"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
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#4
RE: What to say to Grandma?
I wouldn't do anything. I know it's annoying, but I think in this case, a lack of words communicates way more strongly than anything you could say to her.
Nolite te bastardes carborundorum.
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#5
RE: What to say to Grandma?
Tell her something to give her a heart attack.
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
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#6
RE: What to say to Grandma?
Be respectful, and tell people you love what they want to hear. Otherwise it just becomes a battle of the egos.
You're better than that.
Then again, I'm half Vulcan.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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#7
RE: What to say to Grandma?
I can't argue with Vulcan logic. Smile <3
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#8
RE: What to say to Grandma?
Put pervert priest cartoon in Google search box and click images.  Then send her one whenever she does it.

Like:

[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRnVAsEFCkeu2kzbzIlviJ...uFj8M6nPMQ]
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#9
RE: What to say to Grandma?
(September 1, 2015 at 8:38 pm)ignoramus Wrote: Be respectful, and tell people you love what they want to hear. Otherwise it just becomes a battle of the egos.
You're better than that.
Then again, I'm half Vulcan.

(September 1, 2015 at 9:17 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Put pervert priest cartoon in Google search box and click images.  Then send her one whenever she does it.

Like:

[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRnVAsEFCkeu2kzbzIlviJ...uFj8M6nPMQ]

Yes, yes, yes.... My grandma does claim to love humorous cartoons. Wink
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#10
RE: What to say to Grandma?
Update... she emailed me again, asking if I've changed my mind about being an atheist. I told her it's not really something I can just change my mind about, but if she would like to ask me any questions about it, she is more than welcome to. She replied saying she has no questions but that she wants me to change my mind before it's too late. Feeling a little pissed off, I replied letting her know that I have an open mind and that if I ever do find reason to believe again, I will, but that I've searched for god more than most people and have left no stone unturned or question unasked. I told her I feel atheism isn't an "option" I just whimsically chose, but the conclusion to an extensive decade-long search.
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