Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 23, 2024, 8:36 am
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
vorlon13 Offline
Posting Freak
*****
Religious Views: agnostic 12 stepper
Posts: 30129
Threads: 304
Joined: April 18, 2014
Reputation: 92
#11
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 9:32 pm
God is healing a stomach tumor of someone here, and they don't even know they have it yet !!

PRAISE Jesus !!
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




Find
Reply
Salacious B. Crumb Offline Donators
Don't Fear the Reaper
*****
Religious Views: Unincorporeal Afaitheist
Posts: 951
Threads: 19
Joined: April 26, 2015
Reputation: 26
#12
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 9:34 pm
(September 26, 2015 at 9:29 pm)Thena323 Wrote:
(September 26, 2015 at 9:25 pm)Salacious B. Crumb Wrote: HOW DID YOU KNOW!? OMG haha

I always find psychics funny, because they could be something more lucrative than telling people's fortunes. They could be at the racetrack, betting sports, or playing a ticket at the nearest gas station to get a lottery ticket. Then they say that it doesn't work that way. They sound just like the theists on here trying to explain how they talk to god. Every logical question that comes their way, is always redirected to something else. Yes, you talk to god, but you can't test it. Yes, you're psychic, but we can't test it either. It doesn't work that way..  Yeah, Okaaayy.. surrreeee.

How did I know you were going to say that then?

OOOOHHHHH SHIITTTT!!! Bow Down

What's my future look like?
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' -Isaac Asimov-
Find
Reply
Athene Offline Donators
Do You See What I See?
*****
Religious Views: N/A
Posts: 5599
Threads: 37
Joined: July 13, 2015
Reputation: 61
#13
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 9:38 pm (This post was last modified: September 26, 2015 at 9:56 pm by Athene.)
(September 26, 2015 at 9:20 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: Um.........How long ago did I stop beating my wife? (oh shit, there is no good answer for that)

Er...........What do I have inside me right now? (damn, to many correct answers possible)

Ah..........How much money do I have to give you? (think I got her now)
Um...Nice try, but my gift is real. I know that your wife does all of the beating.

Er....Now that you know I'm legit, do you want me to answer that? Suffice it to say, it's probably the reason she keeps beating you.

Ah...Not a cent. I'm not taking money from some poor guy who gets beat by his wife!
Find
Reply
Athene Offline Donators
Do You See What I See?
*****
Religious Views: N/A
Posts: 5599
Threads: 37
Joined: July 13, 2015
Reputation: 61
#14
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 9:47 pm
(September 26, 2015 at 9:34 pm)Salacious B. Crumb Wrote:
(September 26, 2015 at 9:29 pm)Thena323 Wrote: How did I know you were going to say that then?

OOOOHHHHH SHIITTTT!!!  Bow Down

What's my future look like?
You're going to lose something, but you'll find it. Just make sure the cops don't find it as well.

I also see a woman in your future.  You don't know her, yet. But you will at some point.
You will desire her...maybe.
Find
Reply
Athene Offline Donators
Do You See What I See?
*****
Religious Views: N/A
Posts: 5599
Threads: 37
Joined: July 13, 2015
Reputation: 61
#15
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 9:54 pm
(September 26, 2015 at 9:32 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: God is healing a stomach tumor of someone here, and they don't even know they have it yet !!

PRAISE Jesus !!
Whoo-hoo! We've got a live one here. Psychic and filled with that Holy Ghost fire!
Hallelujah!
Find
Reply
Mermaid Offline
Some random chick
***
Religious Views: Godless whore
Posts: 1715
Threads: 9
Joined: September 20, 2015
Reputation: 18
#16
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 10:28 pm
If you are psychic, can you throw me some winning lottery numbers?
If The Flintstones have taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.

-Homer Simpson
Find
Reply
Darkstar Away
Wields a Blade of Reason
****
Religious Views: Ethical Anti-theism
Posts: 3117
Threads: 16
Joined: September 17, 2012
Reputation: 35
#17
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 10:37 pm
(September 26, 2015 at 10:28 pm)Mermaid Wrote: If you are psychic, can you throw me some winning lottery numbers?

If I can do it, does that make me psychic?

Look at all of these winning lottery numbers!
John Adams Wrote:The Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion.
Find
Reply
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#18
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 26, 2015 at 11:27 pm
Thena, I'm a retrospective psychic with a 100% track record! When my footy team loses, I say "I bloody knew they'd lose", but when they win, I had a feeling they would!
I know, it sounds unbelievable to me too. It's a gift, what can I say!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply
Salacious B. Crumb Offline Donators
Don't Fear the Reaper
*****
Religious Views: Unincorporeal Afaitheist
Posts: 951
Threads: 19
Joined: April 26, 2015
Reputation: 26
#19
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 27, 2015 at 12:01 am
(September 26, 2015 at 9:47 pm)Thena323 Wrote:
(September 26, 2015 at 9:34 pm)Salacious B. Crumb Wrote: OOOOHHHHH SHIITTTT!!!  Bow Down

What's my future look like?
You're going to lose something, but you'll find it. Just make sure the cops don't find it as well.

I also see a woman in your future.  You don't know her, yet. But you will at some point.
You will desire her...maybe.

Thank you. You are a true prophetess. I am forever in debt to you.

How may I be of service?
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' -Isaac Asimov-
Find
Reply
Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
*****
Religious Views: Fuck It
Posts: 69247
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation: 259
#20
RE: Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.
September 27, 2015 at 12:40 am
What stock should I buy Monday morning?
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
Truly Psychic...Not Ashamed.

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Can Norway Ever Truly Pay For Its Sins? BrianSoddingBoru4 9 921 December 7, 2021 at 5:12 pm
Last Post: vulcanlogician
  Was Bruce Wayne truly innocent? The Valkyrie 32 3858 April 15, 2020 at 10:58 pm
Last Post: ignoramus
  Truly Dark thesummerqueen 28 9565 January 2, 2012 at 3:35 am
Last Post: passionatefool



Users browsing this thread: 2 Guest(s)