Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation:
156
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:33 pm
(This post was last modified: October 8, 2015 at 4:34 pm by Cyberman.)
(October 8, 2015 at 4:31 pm)drfuzzy Wrote: Great job! And I bet you wrote that yourself! I'm going to try to create a few original ones, but I have to admit, I "stole" (oops, plagiarized, better 'fess up!!) these from this site: Dave's Limerick Site warning: some of 'em are pretty graphic. 
You know who was the author of the biggest collection of dirty limericks?
Isaac Asimov.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Posts: 28164
Threads: 522
Joined: June 16, 2015
Reputation:
90
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:34 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 10:59 am)Catholic_Lady Wrote: Haha, yeah I've just been a lil busy but should be home for most of the day today. What's KJV mean anyway? Shaving, trimming?
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental.
Posts: 3101
Threads: 10
Joined: September 7, 2015
Reputation:
49
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:34 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 4:31 pm)drfuzzy Wrote: (October 8, 2015 at 4:26 pm)TheRocketSurgeon Wrote: Love your limericks, doc! Lemme try one:
The fundies they all sound so crazy,
Yet I think that they're just a bit lazy.
They'll swear it's all true
And explain it for you
But it only makes things seem more hazy. Great job! And I bet you wrote that yourself! I'm going to try to create a few original ones, but I have to admit, I "stole" (oops, plagiarized, better 'fess up!!) these from this site: Dave's Limerick Site warning: some of 'em are pretty graphic.
Oh. Yeah... uh, sorry, I thought you were making 'em up as you went. 
Thought I'd join in.
A Christian told me: if you were saved you cant lose your salvation. you're sealed with the Holy Ghost
I replied: Can I refuse? Because I find the entire concept of vicarious blood sacrifice atonement to be morally abhorrent, the concept of holding flawed creatures permanently accountable for social misbehaviors and thought crimes to be morally abhorrent, and the concept of calling something "free" when it comes with the strings of subjugation and obedience perhaps the most morally abhorrent of all... and that's without even going into the history of justifying genocide, slavery, rape, misogyny, religious intolerance, and suppression of free speech which has been attributed by your own scriptures to your deity. I want a refund. I would burn happily rather than serve the monster you profess to love.
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation:
156
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:36 pm
(This post was last modified: October 8, 2015 at 4:36 pm by Cyberman.)
(October 8, 2015 at 10:59 am)Catholic_Lady Wrote: Haha, yeah I've just been a lil busy but should be home for most of the day today. What's KJV mean anyway?
KJV = Kitschy Jewish Vajazzling.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Posts: 3101
Threads: 10
Joined: September 7, 2015
Reputation:
49
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:36 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 4:30 pm)Crossless1 Wrote: A Christian once came to my door,
But his reasoning powers were poor.
I tried on a whim
To argue with him,
Which soon proved to be quite a bore.
That's mah dude!  
Representing Lousy-anna!
A Christian told me: if you were saved you cant lose your salvation. you're sealed with the Holy Ghost
I replied: Can I refuse? Because I find the entire concept of vicarious blood sacrifice atonement to be morally abhorrent, the concept of holding flawed creatures permanently accountable for social misbehaviors and thought crimes to be morally abhorrent, and the concept of calling something "free" when it comes with the strings of subjugation and obedience perhaps the most morally abhorrent of all... and that's without even going into the history of justifying genocide, slavery, rape, misogyny, religious intolerance, and suppression of free speech which has been attributed by your own scriptures to your deity. I want a refund. I would burn happily rather than serve the monster you profess to love.
Posts: 3541
Threads: 0
Joined: January 20, 2015
Reputation:
35
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:36 pm
(This post was last modified: October 8, 2015 at 4:36 pm by Homeless Nutter.)
(October 8, 2015 at 4:33 pm)TheRocketSurgeon Wrote: I think, if I was an immoral god, and I knew I would come back to life in three days, I would volunteer to go through everything Jesus went through, just to see what it was like. Yeah, it would hurt a lot, but you know you can't die, so why not have a hell of (geddit?) an experience?
[...]
Yup. BDSM people go through worse on an average school-night...
"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one." - George Bernard Shaw
Posts: 7568
Threads: 20
Joined: July 26, 2013
Reputation:
54
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:46 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 4:33 pm)Stimbo Wrote: (October 8, 2015 at 4:31 pm)drfuzzy Wrote: Great job! And I bet you wrote that yourself! I'm going to try to create a few original ones, but I have to admit, I "stole" (oops, plagiarized, better 'fess up!!) these from this site: Dave's Limerick Site warning: some of 'em are pretty graphic.
You know who was the author of the biggest collection of dirty limericks?
Isaac Asimov.
Asimov was quite prolific
(512 books, to be specific).
Yet in between tomes
He dabbled in poems
And wrote more limericks than physics.
Posts: 254
Threads: 8
Joined: October 7, 2015
Reputation:
1
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:46 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 4:29 pm)Stimbo Wrote: (October 8, 2015 at 4:09 pm)sinnerdaniel94 Wrote: the saved will live on a new earth with Jesus, not in the clouds. you read too many fairytales
Ok, now I know you're a Poe. They always get too cocky and start over-egging it.
Just admit it and we can move on. C'mon; confession is supposed to be good for the soul.
Im not joking
Posts: 3541
Threads: 0
Joined: January 20, 2015
Reputation:
35
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:49 pm
(October 8, 2015 at 4:46 pm)sinnerdaniel94 Wrote: Im not joking
No, of course not. You ARE the joke.
"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one." - George Bernard Shaw
Posts: 3101
Threads: 10
Joined: September 7, 2015
Reputation:
49
RE: What the bible says Hell is like
October 8, 2015 at 4:50 pm
They say that Jesus will come
Make heaven but only for some,
Built right here on earth
Out of infinite worth
Man, they must think I am dumb!
A Christian told me: if you were saved you cant lose your salvation. you're sealed with the Holy Ghost
I replied: Can I refuse? Because I find the entire concept of vicarious blood sacrifice atonement to be morally abhorrent, the concept of holding flawed creatures permanently accountable for social misbehaviors and thought crimes to be morally abhorrent, and the concept of calling something "free" when it comes with the strings of subjugation and obedience perhaps the most morally abhorrent of all... and that's without even going into the history of justifying genocide, slavery, rape, misogyny, religious intolerance, and suppression of free speech which has been attributed by your own scriptures to your deity. I want a refund. I would burn happily rather than serve the monster you profess to love.
|
