My heart is breaking... I thought Christians are suppose to love "unconditionally"

[Edwardo Piet]

I feel like I can give unconditional love to an animal, but not to a human.

Careful Rob, your wife has your trousers

[*Deidre*]

lol 

Yea, being a believer in general, not just a Christian, doesn't mean that's synonymous with becoming a doormat. 

From my perspective, I think God (from a Christian view) does love the person, unconditionally, but it's not defined in the type of love we are always prone to talking about. There are different types of love, and levels, I'd say. There are Christians however who think every 'sin' a person commits puts them further away from God's love. I guess it's a matter of perspective, but that's a terrible way to go through faith...and life.

If God loves with an 'unfamiliar' love (Agape') then is that yet not another condition? (Meaning God loves on His terms not ours.. ours being with out condition)

I wouldn't call His love hinging on 'conditions.' But, rather He would like for us to live our best lives, and that requires us to follow His plan. (everyone's rolling their eyes) But, it had to be said.

[rexbeccarox]

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I've been a strong christian for most of my life but until two months ago. I have my reasons for becoming an atheist but I swear that I don't hate 'God' or any gods. It's just that I feel I've matured in seeing how the world works. Anyways. I've been dating with my gf for almost 4 years now. She's still a believer. Even though I turned to an atheist I still keep a lot of wisdoms and lessons I learned from the Bible.  I consider myself a kind, humble, nice, funny, non-judgmental. The very last time I met with my gf, she didn't kiss me anymore. She didn't even want to touch me anymore... or even had a hard time letting me hold her hand. This really broke my heart even though I didn't tell her.

I've always thought Christians are suppose to be able to learn "unconditionally" no matter what their partner suddenly believes in as long as he doesn't become violent or abusive or try to force something they don't want to do. In our case, all I want from her is to respect my lack of belief. I don't force her to become an atheist either (mostly because I don't think she'll understand the phrases I'd use to even explain her what caused my decision. She's not as smart as me (I'm not that smart either) but I love her for who she is. I'd love her no matter how she looks fat/skinny, sick... Even if she becomes a different religion I'll still love her but... this change that she showed me really broke my heart. As I write this, I can feel our almost-4 years relationship is coming to an end. She's my first relationship (not first crush/love).

It's hard for me to ask her any much more questions as I fear it'll speed up this ending process. If you're a female and your bf becomes an atheist (friendly), what do you want from him to keep your relationship besides forcing him to be a believer again?

What are my options? Give me some ideas...

I just can't imagine living a life without seeing her beautiful face smiling for me but for someone else :'(



Thanks

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Is this real?

Are you seriously saying Christians can't break up with people because You think they are supposed to love unconditionally?

If so, know your answer is no. No Christian's are not supposed to Love unconditionally. God does not love unconditionally.

Ever read John 3:16? "For God so loved the world that He gave his only Son that whosoever believes in Him..."

Did you see that? "That Whosoever believes..." That my broken hearted emo friend is a condition to God's love. "Do this and get that." That being ever lasting life.

So that means your girl can come and go/love as she likes, till she gets married, then she will be trapped forever/till death 'smiling' at her husband.

Plus look on the bright side, your an atheist now, and you can find 'happiness' in the 3 P's. Pot, Porn and Pizza! isn't that the reason no one want's to acknowledge God anymore? Plus you can buy a bunch of black cloths get everything pierced twice and drive your parents nuts! that seems to be alot of fun for people who don't get what/who they want now a days!

You. Are. Fucking. Vile.

[thesummerqueen]

Is anyone surprised by this?

[MTL]

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---

Is this real?

Are you seriously saying Christians can't break up with people because You think they are supposed to love unconditionally?

If so, know your answer is no. No Christian's are not supposed to Love unconditionally. God does not love unconditionally.

Ever read John 3:16? "For God so loved the world that He gave his only Son that whosoever believes in Him..."

Did you see that? "That Whosoever believes..." That my broken hearted emo friend is a condition to God's love. "Do this and get that." That being ever lasting life.

So that means your girl can come and go/love as she likes, till she gets married, then she will be trapped forever/till death 'smiling' at her husband.

Plus look on the bright side, your an atheist now, and you can find 'happiness' in the 3 P's. Pot, Porn and Pizza! isn't that the reason no one want's to acknowledge God anymore? Plus you can buy a bunch of black cloths get everything pierced twice and drive your parents nuts! that seems to be alot of fun for people who don't get what/who they want now a days!

You. Are. Fucking. Vile.

He is.  he overuses that ROTFL emogi, and always to express vicious (albeit undemonstrable and therefore unjustifiable) derision. 

It just shuts down any value of conversation with him,
if he's going to be so calculatedly, relentlessly, arrogantly, needlessly, remorselessly unkind and condescending.

I draw comfort from the fact that his belief basically hinges on a determination to delude himself no matter what
and that there is, in all likelihood, absolutely zero reward  waiting for him in eternity...for all his troubles.

I ordinarily don't take pleasure, per se, in the disappointment I think awaits most Theists,
because many are kind and humble, at least;

but he is the very cankerous type of toothache of a Theist that first gave me my earliest reasons to despise religion.

There is such a thing as being a "good ambassador of Christ".

He is anything but.

[MTL]

I feel like I can give unconditional love to an animal, but not to a human.

Can I get an 'Amen' to that.

[MTL]

Unconditional love is a peculiar concept. Will you love me when I'm old and wrinkled and in a wheelchair? Will you love me if I murder your mother? Truly unconditional love means you will love someone no matter what they do or become, or even who they really are. If it turns out your spouse is a KGB sleeper agent, unconditional love would require you to keep on loving him or her. Why would you love someone if not for who they are?

Children get unconditional love, because that's how it works, but even that is only up to a point. If there is literally NOTHING your child could do to lose your affection, that strikes me as a bit monstrous; and I hope you haven't the sort of child who'll have you pushing strangers down the basement stairs to assuage their nigh uncontrollable lust for torture-murder and necrophilia.

If you change too much in ways that make you a person I can't love, I'll stop loving you. That's honest. Unconditional love is, at best, an exaggeration. It's okay to stop loving someone. It happens all the time. It's natural. That's life. You hope it doesn't happen, but sometimes things don't work out. We don't have a duty to force ourselves to keep loving someone we can't love anymore.

I acknowledge that the above rant probably indicates that I have put too much morbid thought into this.

Another angle is to consider that it is possible to love and hate someone at the same time.

It's a terrible thing to feel, it's torture...

Being unable to avoid feeling hatred for the same person for whom you are also unable to avoid feeling love.

[dyresand]

I've been a strong christian for most of my life but until two months ago. I have my reasons for becoming an atheist but I swear that I don't hate 'God' or any gods. It's just that I feel I've matured in seeing how the world works. Anyways. I've been dating with my gf for almost 4 years now. She's still a believer. Even though I turned to an atheist I still keep a lot of wisdoms and lessons I learned from the Bible.  I consider myself a kind, humble, nice, funny, non-judgmental. The very last time I met with my gf, she didn't kiss me anymore. She didn't even want to touch me anymore... or even had a hard time letting me hold her hand. This really broke my heart even though I didn't tell her.

I've always thought Christians are suppose to be able to learn "unconditionally" no matter what their partner suddenly believes in as long as he doesn't become violent or abusive or try to force something they don't want to do. In our case, all I want from her is to respect my lack of belief. I don't force her to become an atheist either (mostly because I don't think she'll understand the phrases I'd use to even explain her what caused my decision. She's not as smart as me (I'm not that smart either) but I love her for who she is. I'd love her no matter how she looks fat/skinny, sick... Even if she becomes a different religion I'll still love her but... this change that she showed me really broke my heart. As I write this, I can feel our almost-4 years relationship is coming to an end. She's my first relationship (not first crush/love).

It's hard for me to ask her any much more questions as I fear it'll speed up this ending process. If you're a female and your bf becomes an atheist (friendly), what do you want from him to keep your relationship besides forcing him to be a believer again?

What are my options? Give me some ideas...

I just can't imagine living a life without seeing her beautiful face smiling for me but for someone else :'(



Thanks

Is this real?

Are you seriously saying Christians can't break up with people because You think they are supposed to love unconditionally?

If so, know your answer is no. No Christian's are not supposed to Love unconditionally. God does not love unconditionally.

Ever read John 3:16? "For God so loved the world that He gave his only Son that whosoever believes in Him..."

Did you see that? "That Whosoever believes..." That my broken hearted emo friend is a condition to God's love. "Do this and get that." That being ever lasting life.

So that means your girl can come and go/love as she likes, till she gets married, then she will be trapped forever/till death 'smiling' at her husband.

Plus look on the bright side, your an atheist now, and you can find 'happiness' in the 3 P's. Pot, Porn and Pizza! isn't that the reason no one want's to acknowledge God anymore? Plus you can buy a bunch of black cloths get everything pierced twice and drive your parents nuts! that seems to be alot of fun for people who don't get what/who they want now a days!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhkNLHictW8

[Drich]

If God loves with an 'unfamiliar' love (Agape') then is that yet not another condition? (Meaning God loves on His terms not ours.. ours being with out condition)

I wouldn't call His love hinging on 'conditions.' But, rather He would like for us to live our best lives, and that requires us to follow His plan. (everyone's rolling their eyes) But, it had to be said.

...and if we don't and do not accept Christ are we still promised love or wrath?

Unconditional= without reservation or without condition. Accepting Christ is indeed a condition.
John 3:16 spells out God's conditions.

What of those in whom the bible records God hating?

[Drich]

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---

Is this real?

Are you seriously saying Christians can't break up with people because You think they are supposed to love unconditionally?

If so, know your answer is no. No Christian's are not supposed to Love unconditionally. God does not love unconditionally.

Ever read John 3:16? "For God so loved the world that He gave his only Son that whosoever believes in Him..."

Did you see that? "That Whosoever believes..." That my broken hearted emo friend is a condition to God's love. "Do this and get that." That being ever lasting life.

So that means your girl can come and go/love as she likes, till she gets married, then she will be trapped forever/till death 'smiling' at her husband.

Plus look on the bright side, your an atheist now, and you can find 'happiness' in the 3 P's. Pot, Porn and Pizza! isn't that the reason no one want's to acknowledge God anymore? Plus you can buy a bunch of black cloths get everything pierced twice and drive your parents nuts! that seems to be alot of fun for people who don't get what/who they want now a days!

You. Are. Fucking. Vile.

unlike the POE/Op who is trying to use a religion to entrap/trick someone into a relationship?

If me calling out a twisted senerio like that is vile in your little mind, while the one who supposedly seeks to entrap someone into a relatioship with them, by using their deeply held religious beliefs is not... Then by all accounts i seek to be 'vile' in your mind's eye.