Can I just say, and I'm just being honest...

[Excited Penguin]

This message is only meant for Mamacita. I would appreciate it if everyone resisted their curiosity and didn't read it. Not out of respect for me, but for her. I can't PM because she blocked me. And I'm the complete moron who can't give someone their space. The short version of the post, and the essential part, is a cringy love declaration and an apology. That's really it, no need to read the message. Thanks.

---

I know you'll never talk to me again.

I'm the biggest idiot that ever lived, and to create that drama with what you have going on was something I'll regret for a really long time. I'm owning up to it, I'm not going to look for excuses.

I'm willing to do anything for you to forgive me. And I mean anything.

But this is not about me. And this isn't the best time for this. I just wanted to tell you that I'm always thinking about you. I'm crazy about you. I love you. I panicked yesterday and acted like my usual self, even though I promised you I would never try to hurt you.

I don't care about anyone here but you. And you can do anything you want, if you ever decide to trust me again. You will never hear a word of complaint from me ever again. 

You did say you would be giving me second chances, after all... Just know this will be the last one you'll have to give me, if you do.

I'm in love with you, Ivy. I can't stop thinking about you. And I'm sorry. I hope you're ok and I hope it turns out well.

I'm very immature in a lot of ways, and I can be really insensitive sometimes. But I will never do anything like that to you ever again. I just hope you're okay, my heart breaks when I think how you must feel right now and I only made it worse.

---

[account_inactive]

That was the most cringe-worthy thing I have ever read on this forum, EP.

[Excited Penguin]

If anyone thinks I just did something wrong, I'm more than happy to suffer the consequences. I didn't mean to embarass anyone but myself, but the klutz that I am, I guess this realization must be flying over my head right now.

[Excited Penguin]

Well, if anything, I regret putting someone else in an awkward position, though I only realise it now, somehow.

Anyway, I'm an imbecile. But I meant every word.

[Losty]

CIJS if you say it's all in my head one more time I swear to god I will knock your teeth into the back of your throat...in my head of course

I fuckin' hate people like that, I've been surrounded by them all my life in one capacity or another, until very recently.

It's like... how the fuck would you know if it is in my head, random person who is outside of my head?  

Apparently some people know more about my health than my doctors do. They can all fuck themselves.

[Joods]

You do realize that if you didn't want anyone to read that, there's this handy thing here called a PM.
Because hoping others won't read it is pointless. Especially on a public message board.

Just some friendly advice hun.

[Excited Penguin]

You do realize that if you didn't want anyone to read that, there's this handy thing here called a PM.
Because hoping others won't read it is pointless. Especially on a public message board.

Just some friendly advice hun.

Yes, I realize that. I'm blocked however.

I wouldn't care if anyone read it, except for not putting the person I'm referring to in an awkward position.

I can't stress enough how much of an idiot I am. People shouldn't think I thought this through or anything like that. I didn't. I'm just that much of a cretin.

If mods think I did something wrong I beg of them to delete/edit the message and ban me. I honestly don't care.

[Joods]

I don't know what happened, but I hope things will be okay for the both of you.

[Excited Penguin]

I don't know what happened, but I hope things will be okay for the both of you.

Lol, don't get me wrong. There is no both of us. I'm a mere admirer. A pathetic one at that.

Let's face it. I'm a loser. I'm a kid compared to her, as well as compared to most people here. I'm under no illusions about that.

People should really understand that part.

[Losty]

CIJS, I really want to be there for you. I feel like a shitty person. The pain is just too much for me to bear right now, thanks for understanding.