Victim Blaming?

[Thumpalumpacus]

So you've gone from arguing with people who don't disagree with you to comparing prison rape to societal rape to hypothesizing about the outcome of the American presidential campaign's outcome?

Yeah, there's an agenda in play here.

Remember, girls, if you have a couple of drinks, you're helping ISIS, you victims, you.

ETA: I'm going to ask you again to support the last claim in your previous post. Failure to do so will result in mockery, sarcasm, and probably a little butthurt on your part.

[account_inactive]

[..]

Germany and Sweden have pretty much given up on that. Oh wait strike that, they expect all women to change behavior with government officials telling women to wear less revealing clothes even suggesting they wear a burqa, put on a bracelet that says "don't touch me" (I guess this is educating the rapist?) and wear sneakers to be able to run away from would-be rapists.

Germany and Sweden are beyond ruined and the kids are brainwashed in schools to accept multiculturalism and the destruction of their culture. I fear that it is too late for the whole of Europe now.

Pray to God that if Clinton wins she won't become America's Angela Merkel because if a similar "migrant crisis" is unleashed over here, women will be thrown under the bus and be drown out by the self congratulatory suicide of "cultural diversity."

Feminists are strangely silent when it's Muslims raping people.

[Thumpalumpacus]

Diversity is a code word for no white people.

[account_inactive]

Diversity is a code word for no white people.

Nice.

Thanks for the response!

[Thumpalumpacus]

No problem, you deserved it.

[Ben Davis]

Can we as a society stop pretending that saying "You shouldn't get blackout wasted." is somehow victim blaming?

No. Because it is. Let's be completely clear about this so there's no ambiguity, advising responsible drinking is completely different to telling a victim of rape that the responsibility of the rapist is partially diminished. The first is making sure that people are aware that society is unable to fully act on it's responsibility for communal safety and that negative things can happen as a result of intoxication, the other is victim blaming. If I get drunk, fall over and break my ankle, that's all my fault and people should rightly reprimand me for being irresponsible. If I get drunk and someone else takes advantage of my condition, I need victim-support not criticism. Or do you think that it's not the responsibility of people to not take advantage of vulnerable people, irrespective of the reasons for the vulnerability?

[LadyForCamus]

I understand both sides of the argument.

Females shouldn't have to worry about doing something, like drinking, or dressing in a certain way, or partying with strangers, lest they get raped. They shouldn't and it's unfair. And it can be hard for some males to relate to this, case in point with Ark there.

But it is a reality. Rape happens a lot. We have to deal with it to the best of our abilities.

Life is neither fair nor nice. Most living things have to fight tooth and nail or fly away to remain living in the natural environment.

I'm saying trying to blame either party gets in the way of actually being able to prepare for and deal with the situation if it happens. It's completely beside the point of rational self protection....which starts with being able to remain conscious and in good control of all your facilities.

Alright, here we go. I probably shouldn't even be in this discussion at all, but since Losty was brave and opened that door, I'm going to follow her through (and probably regret it later) in order to further her point, because I think it's an important one.

I was that girl. I was the walking, talking cliche college chick who got too drunk at a large house party. Too drunk to go home with my friends. So drunk that I passed out on a futon in one of the bedrooms in the apartment. The idiot who said, "noooo, I'll be fine," when my girlfriends begged me to come home with them, because I was literally too wasted to walk. Ofc, it wasn't my intention to get that drunk but...I dunno, shit happens when you're young and dumb. Suffice it to say, I should have went with them.

I have long since emotionally and psychologically processed the physical assault committed against me. I'm fully over the experience of the actual act itself. What DOES still keep me awake some nights almost 10 years later, is the shame of my actions. My own failure to behave as a responsible adult; to do the bare minimum in order to stay safe. Regret is a powerful emotion.

Blaming the victim serves NO meaningful purpose, because she more than likely already blames herself, and probably always will to some extent. Holding the perpetrator responsible for his actions is the only thing that matters once a crime has already been committed.

We are a mostly-civilized country; not a pack of wild animals in the woods. Ark, your comments are reminiscent of ScienceAF's earlier thread on the subject which amounted to: 'men gonna rape, nothing we can do about it!' And that's just a wholly ineffective attitude toward the subject. I acted a fool all over the place in college; went to plenty of parties, had many male friendships and acquaintances who I got very drunk with very often, and who NEVER, EVER tried to hurt me when I was vulnerable. It was just the one guy who happened to be a rapist.

Education as a means of prevention for both young men and women is important, but blaming someone for something after it has ALREADY happened is...just dumb.

[LadyForCamus]

Did I just make it awkward? ?

[Faith No More]

On average, about one in four men included in the study said they had raped someone at some point in their lives. One in ten had raped someone who wasn’t their romantic partner.

Well, going by your own statistics, getting in a romantic relationship drastically increases a woman's chance of getting raped. Do you also advise that women not get romantically involved with a man?

Note: This isn't meant to be a gotcha question. I'm generally curious, because I'd like to think there has to be some middle ground where we can let women know the risks of certain behavior without making them feel as if they're responsible.

[Faith No More]

Remember, diversity is a code word for no white people.

I know, right? We used to be pure here in America, but those goddamn potato-eating Irish moved in. Then it was the smelly Italians. Fuckin' diversity nearly killed us.