Wonderful.
I don't want to have Aspergers... but I don't want to not get it resolved and treated if I do have it. And I am tired of having no explanation and recommended treatment for my mental problems.
If it's a positive result it does mean I can finally get the treatment I have been needing all my life.
And....
I mean............TBH. it would explain a lot. Like my whole life. Lol.
If the result is a negative it means I can go through with standard CBT treatment and maybe some medication that will treat my obsessive compulsive symptoms (which I do think are related to Apergers... explains my not liking change, wanting to stay in my comfort zone, obsessions with rules, and my social awkwardness).
IRL I'm socially isolated and everyone would think I was an introvert. I'm an extrovert in the sense that I get energized from soclization rahter than exhausted. I don't need time apart from socializig to recharge, time apart from socliazing exhausts me.
However I do exhaust myself an awful lot. Especially lately. I'm very socially awkard lately I think although at least today specifically I think I'm handling it a little better by at least responding to and addressing it when it's brought up.
Everyone likes me in RL, even my ex-roommate who became very nasty and vile to me likes me now that her anger has faded... of course if I ever let her get close to me or accepted any of her help she'd no doubt mistreat me and treat me like crap and start hating me -- or at least acting like she hated me again.
I think my ex-roommate often got angry with me because she couldn't get what she wanted and she was very nasty and mistreated me a lot but I don't think she ever hated me. In fact if she had hated me perhaps things would have been easier for me because she would have left me alone and not tried to control me with guilt.
So yeah, everyone likes me in RL.... but I am too trusting and get hurt a lot