Unloading

[vorlon13]

I was at the doctor's office today waiting for a blood draw, and they called in a couple with a tiny baby all wrapped up in blankies. They were in the room for that, and even with the door closed, I could hear the baby screaming during the procedure.  And the cry wasn't 'right'.  Didn't sound like any crying baby I'd heard before.  Hard not to think of this, and then went I went in the room next, it was hard to keep my composure.

No idea what's up with the baby, never actually saw it for all the coverings, but it will be a long while before I forget that crying . . . .

Oh wow. I hope the baby is ok. Hopefully it was just some colic or a little cold. 

I hope so, I try to avoid sick kids and infants. 

Guess the kid couldn't be too sick, it was the drs. office, not the hospital . . .

[Joods]

I'm so sorry CL. I will agree that one pregnancy does not indicate a pattern.

Let me also say that my oldest was born with Down syndrome. Despite a bunch of medical issues, her "disability" of having Down syndrome has not stopped her from becoming a beautiful and wonderful young lady. She's now 21 and has a great quality of life.

And...seven years after I had her, I went on to have a healthy baby girl, with no problems, who now, at the age of 14, simply has a smart mouth due to being a teenager. She makes the Distinguished Honor Roll every marking period in school and is in all advanced, honors classes.

I wouldn't lose all hope yet. I was 24 when I had my first one and 31 when I had my second one.

Hugs, my friend.

I've seen pictures of your daughter and she is beautiful. If I may ask, when/how did you find out she had Downs? And how did you handle it emotionally?

Sure

I found out ten days before I had her. Around 34 weeks I was complaining of little to no movements so they did a fetal stress test and did fetal monitoring. It was discovered during an ultrasound that she had adualdeno atresia in her upper intestine. They wanted to do an amniocentesis to rule out a congenital abnormality. When those test results came back, it confirmed Down syndrome. The test is not typically done after 20 weeks because there is not a whole lot of room for a 7 inch needle and the chances of sticking the baby are higher. Mine was done at 34 weeks and she was not stuck.

It's important for me to tell you that although she is my oldest, she was also my fifth pregnancy. Because of that, I was followed by a perinatologist, which is a more experienced doctor than an OB.

[Catholic_Lady]

I've seen pictures of your daughter and she is beautiful. If I may ask, when/how did you find out she had Downs? And how did you handle it emotionally?

Sure

I found out ten days before I had her. Around 34 weeks I was complaining of little to no movements so they did a fetal stress test and did fetal monitoring. It was discovered during an ultrasound that she had adualdeno atresia in her upper intestine. They wanted to do an amniocentesis to rule out a congenital abnormality. When those test results came back, it confirmed Down syndrome. The test is not typically done after 20 weeks because there is not a whole lot of room for a 7 inch needle and the chances of sticking the baby are higher. Mine was done at 34 weeks and she was not stuck.

It's important for me to tell you that although she is my oldest, she was also my fifth pregnancy.  Because of that, I was followed by a perinatologist, which is a more experienced doctor than an OB.

Wow, I'm so sorry you lost 5 of your babies. That's so rough.  

Were they all during 1st trimester? Did the docs ever find out why any of them died?

[Joods]

Actually, I lost four pregnancies. My daughter was the 5th, but the first successful one brought to term. I lost my first one, twins, at six months along due to domestic violence. The following three were all before I made it to 12 weeks. I did not make enough progesterone to sustain those. When I got pregnant with my oldest, they knew how to prevent another loss. I was on hormone treatments during my first trimester.

[Catholic_Lady]

Actually, I lost four pregnancies. My daughter was the 5th, but the first successful one brought to term. I lost my first one, twins, at six months along due to domestic violence. The following three were all before I made it to 12 weeks. I did not make enough progesterone to sustain those. When I got pregnant with my oldest, they knew how to prevent another loss. I was on hormone treatments during my first trimester.

....At a loss for words. I am so sorry. 

[Fireball]

Actually, I lost four pregnancies. My daughter was the 5th, but the first successful one brought to term. I lost my first one, twins, at six months along due to domestic violence. The following three were all before I made it to 12 weeks. I did not make enough progesterone to sustain those. When I got pregnant with my oldest, they knew how to prevent another loss. I was on hormone treatments during my first trimester.

Wow.   Sorry to see this.

[Joods]

Thanks guys, but this thread isn't about my loss. It's about CL and anything I can say that might help her through this, I'm Ok with sharing. It was such a long time ago. Things happen for a reason, I guess. I was 18 with twins on the way. Who knows how different my life would have been now.

CL, if you want to talk to me privately, you know how to reach me, love.

[vorlon13]

An item from that First Ladies book I read recently:

can't remember if it was pat Nixon, Betty Ford or Rosalynn Carter, but one of them accompanied their husband to some grim 3rd world area and while there, was asked to tour a local orphanage.

Before going, the first lady was strongly advised to keep emotions in check during the tour. It being vitally important the kids not see the first lady reacting to the truly horrible and dire circumstances in the facility 'appropriately' but instead the kids see smiles and warmth and cheerfulness, no matter how difficult that would be, lest they be reminded of the truth of their surroundings and lose hope. Additionally, the facility by attracting attention from the first lady, would benefit from increased donations of money food and support and it obviously would be good for the kids too. And then it's clear, the first lady could not accurately describe the conditions there EVER, since the results would be dire for the kids as no one would want to support the facility after that.

I bring this up for a couple reasons; it would never occur to me to ask a first lady (or anyone else) to tour such a facility with those conditions on the grounds I can't imagine it would be possible, especially since I know for myself, I could not do it. Additionally, the first lady did do the tour, remained smiling and a ray of sunshine for those kids and it turned out well. Now, did she have a melt down later? Idunno. What I do know is women can be a shit load tougher than me, and that inner strength is to be admired. And to turn back the horror of that situation with a smile and good cheer, for the benefit of those kids . . . .

words cannot describe.

[Doubting Thomas]

This thread makes me want to cry.

[Catholic_Lady]

This thread makes me want to cry.

Agreed. There is just nothing worse than children dying and/or suffering.