AF Christmas Carol 2016-Lyric Suggestions

[Shell B]

So, the votes are in and the AF Christmas Carol is going to be the 12 days of Christmas. Numerous people liked the idea of changing the lyrics, so this is the place to do that. I personally think stuff that rhymes with the original and has same/similar syllables would sound best, but I'll leave that up to you all.

Ex: "Six theists praying" instead of "Six geese-a-laying."

[Tiberius]

On the X day of Christmas, Atheist Forums gave to me...

^ that works.

Edit: no it doesn't Tibs, learn to count syllables.

[Shell B]

"On the x day of Christmas, the forums gave to me . . . "

[Minimalist]

On the First Day of Xmas the forums gave to me,
Min saying 'blow god out your ass."

[Whateverist]

I came up with these on a first pass in the old thread.  I've struck out the ones I'm less fond of:

A Pantheist in the Family Tree      
Two Sweater Puppies                  ? 
Three Kitten Memes                    ? 
Four Manly Beards
Five Godless Whores                   Five Brand New Reps    
Six Asses Swaying
Seven Couples Spooning
Eight Infants Grilling              +            
Nine Cougars Luring
Ten Geezers Creeping                 Ten Creepers Creeping   ?
Eleven Strippers Stripping
Twelve Trolls a Trolling          +

Making it forum focussed seems the way to go.  Days 2 and 3 don't really accomplish that but speak to content that gets covered here a lot.


So out of all these I mostly like my #8 and #12 with my revised #'s 5 and 10 as so-so maybes.

---

Here again are the original lyrics submitted by Emjay in the old thread:

A Partridge in a Pear Tree
Two Turtle Doves
Three French Hens
Four Calling Birds
Five Gold Rings
Six Geese a Laying
Seven Swans a Swimming
Eight Maids a Milking
Nine Ladies Dancing
Ten Lords a Leaping
Eleven Pipers Piping
Twelve Drummers Drumming

[Tiberius]

Five Spammers Purged!

[Tiberius]

I like the twelve trolls a trolling too.

[Whateverist]

Eleven Cath'lics Pooping?

[Minimalist]

Six Dripshits dripping.

[Whateverist]

For the first day:

"A Rock Crusher for a Deity" ?