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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Off Topic v
Eulogies

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Eulogies
J a c k Offline
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#1
Eulogies
May 9, 2017 at 11:44 pm
"She was firm willed. She was always around. She was great at black jack."

So, she was stubborn? She was clingy? She gambled?

Some people die and it's difficult to say something nice about them. You have to play with the words to make it merciful. When we die, what will they say about us?

I hope they remember me as a simple person. I hope they mention my old favorite sneakers. I hope they mention my cats, and my favorite songs. I think they'll play "The Sound of Silence" (Disturbed) and "Sweet Child o' Mine" (Guns n Roses) in the background, but right before they open my casket, they'll play "I U She" (Peaches) juuuuuuuust to make people feel awkward at a funeral and my tribe can giggle.
I hope they mention my immeasurable love for my sons. I hope I leave them a legacy. I hope they remember I was always passionate even when I was supposed to tone it down. I fucken lived, though! May there be a mention of tacos, beer, and even a bit of politics. Let that funeral get uncomfortable. I hope they dress me up in a suit! With a tie. Never a bow. I hope my kids remember I was BIG on anti-bullying. I also hope they believe I was resilient and strong like a beast!! Gotta work on that, though. Also... I hope someone grabs the mic unexpectedly and while a tear runs down their cheek, in a low and hungry voice they say, "She was king of sex." And then just walk away, the mystery of their name never to be known. Then whoever thought I sucked at it can feel they were at fault. Forever.  Big Grin

I used to say I didn't care what happened in my funeral, because I'd be dead, but things change at age 32! Lol kidding. I just want to live my life in a way that once I'm dead, some things must obviously be said, and that it's not nearly impossible to find something, anything at all.

So when you die... what will be said? Or what do you want people to say?
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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vorlon13 Offline
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#2
RE: Eulogies
May 9, 2017 at 11:47 pm
his hole is still tight . . .
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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J a c k Offline
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#3
RE: Eulogies
May 9, 2017 at 11:52 pm
(May 9, 2017 at 11:47 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: his hole is still tight . . .

ROFLOL
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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Whateverist Away Donators
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#4
RE: Eulogies
May 9, 2017 at 11:54 pm
Not my problem. The less the better? Maybe I should compose something to have read:

"Go home people, nothing to be seen here. Just one more dead guy .. just like everyone of you will be and all too soon. So do something. Take a stand. Take a chance. Act on an impulse. You don't have to go home but you can't go where he's going .. yet. Soon though."
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J a c k Offline
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#5
RE: Eulogies
May 9, 2017 at 11:55 pm
(May 9, 2017 at 11:54 pm)Whateverist Wrote: Not my problem.  The less the better?  Maybe I should compose something to have read:

"Go home people, nothing to be seen here.  Just one more dead guy .. just like everyone of you will be and all too soon.  So do something.  Take a stand.  Take a chance.  Act on an impulse.  You don't have to go home but you can't go where he's going .. yet.  Soon though."

It's missing boom. I'll just show up and talk about your nekid in the garden pictures.
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#6
RE: Eulogies
May 10, 2017 at 12:05 am
"She took so many people with her. She has her own entry in the Guinness book!"
Dying to live, living to die.
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J a c k Offline
Yo momma has swag.
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#7
RE: Eulogies
May 10, 2017 at 12:07 am
(May 10, 2017 at 12:05 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: "She took so many people with her.  She has her own entry in the Guinness book!"

"We're safe now."
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#8
RE: Eulogies
May 10, 2017 at 12:10 am
(May 10, 2017 at 12:07 am)Mamacita Wrote:
(May 10, 2017 at 12:05 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: "She took so many people with her.  She has her own entry in the Guinness book!"

"We're safe now."

Wanna bet?

I also want my coffin loaded with a spring so that, at an opportune moment, I pop out of it like a Jack-in-the-box and scare the crap out of everyone and, perhaps, take some more with me.

At the same time it will trigger a recording of Jar-Jar Binks saying, "Isa back!"
Dying to live, living to die.
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energizer bunny Offline
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#9
RE: Eulogies
May 10, 2017 at 1:01 am
"He stopped aging at 18.  What was his secret??? The world will never know. Yet here he is, dead at 98 looking exactly as he did 80 years ago. I guess he isn't the energizer bunny for nothing. It took 10 shots to the head to finally kill his ass."  Tongue
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J a c k Offline
Yo momma has swag.
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#10
RE: Eulogies
May 10, 2017 at 1:12 am
(May 10, 2017 at 1:01 am)energizer bunny Wrote: "He stopped aging at 18.  What was his secret??? The world will never know. Yet here he is, dead at 98 looking exactly as he did 80 years ago. I guess he isn't the energizer bunny for nothing. It took 10 shots to the head to finally kill his ass."  Tongue

Lol it's funny how some personalities are dependable. Lmao I think it was yesterday that Pocaracas responded to a post of mine and when I saw his name pop up in my talatalk notifications, I smirked knowing it would be something kind of sarcastic. Hahaha and when I saw your name here, I expected something funny like this.

Maybe that could be mentioned in your AF eulogy Tongue
"Hipster is what happens when young hot people do what old ladies do." -Exian
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Eulogies



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