Do you start people at ten, or do they need to earn it?

[paulpablo]

People's scores fluctuate fast with me. Minute by minute. It's basically like how I imagine the stock market looks.

[possibletarian]

My best friend says I start people at ten and then they have to work real hard to work their way down. He starts people at zero, and they have to earn their way up. While five would be a healthy balance, I think it’s true that I tend to meet people and find them fascinating quickly. I love to meet strangers and I take road trips often where my focus is sitting at breweries and people watching. I engage in conversations with odd people, interesting, unique, funny, funky, kind, intimidating, scary, ridiculous people. I always leave feeling richer for having met them and most of my current friends I met this way. My friend says half of the people I’ve met could be thieves, killers, rapists, bullshitters. It took him six months of me showing up at his favorite sports bar for him to let me move up on the 1-10 scale. Lol! I knew we’d be friends since day one, he knew after six months.

What’s your approach? Why? Is this voluntary, or can you not help it?

I tend to simply take people as they come, I'm more interested in who they think they are,  than who I think they are. I have always liked slightly dysfunctional people, maybe because at heart there is always some mess in everyone's life. I'm more at peace with people who have learnt to be at peace with themselves, people who know they are far from perfect, but have made peace with the knowledge of that, there's a certain amount of serenity that comes from such people.

I think once of the biggest moments in my life was when I learnt that it's okay for other people to have different opinions on things, that them being different or thinking differently didn't impact on who I am,  I learnt to listen rather than interrupt.  The strange people I meet as I move around don't bother me, they are only fleeting and even if they are bullshitting it does not matter, they have entertained me at least. 

Sometimes there are people, who for some reason remain in your heart and you hope one day to meet again, There are people you meet only once who never leave your thoughts, and there are people who you had the courage to ask for a number, and remain friends..or better. I don't score (at least not consciously) we all do judge, even though we are unaware, but judgement need not always be a negative, we can look at a person and wish for them to be more in our lives.


All in all I find people hard not to love, with all their idiosyncrasy's I remember to them I am that person they have just met and i endeavour to make that meeting as pleasant as possible.
I don't think we can help it, just as others are simply who they are, so are we who we are.

[KittyAnn]

hmmm.....where have i heard this?! hehe
i have the same, i lack confidence... i'm just a grey mouse
and i think that's why i'm afraid of people, except for what i've already said here i like them

Well you're very smart, as well as nice. I bet you'll be able to have as many friends as you want, when you're ready.

Thank U!
It's very nice...i hope you're right and i wish you the same!

..life without friends is like a garden without flowers,
like a bird closed in a cage that has lost its fancy for singing,
like a living abroad, without language, without understanding what others are saying to us.....

[Succubus]

-3
Give them no quarter. Cut them no slack, no mercy.

[brewer]

Depends on the person and the situation.

Total stranger and absolutely no reason for you to walk up and talk to me except for niceties (hello, excuse me, do you know where.....), 2 or 3. 
Total stranger but at a mutual event/location, 4 to 6.
Total stranger but introduced by a mutual acquaintance, 6.
Never met but have heard about the person, depends on what I've heard, 3 to 6.

The first 5 minutes of exchange can change the initial numbers. Rarely will anyone exceed 8, even with time. Those that do I can count on one hand.

If two strangers knock on my front door, they don't even get ranked. 

Maybe I have trust issues. I definitely keep most people at arms length.

[energizer bunny]

The older i get, the less i feel a need to reduce people to number rankings. In my experience people are too complex for that. I've met plenty of people who were very sweet and nice to me but would betray me quickly as soon as the opportunity presented itself. Just like i know many who were rude but when needed they were the ones there for you.

[Martian Mermaid]

I start at 6

[J a c k]

Lol EB, it’s not like I’m saying you literally rank people. It’s a figure of speech. Do you start them high or low? That simple.

I know people I have in high esteem, yet they’ve made mistakes or hurt me before. Doesn’t mean I bring them down from their “high”. I think my question is pretty clear, though. I usually like people at the start, with a few exceptions.

[Minimalist]

[SteelCurtain]

Ooh, I don't think I've ever thought about this.

I'd like to think I start people higher than 5, but that's probably not truth.

I probably am a little more skeptical of people than I'd like to admit.