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Getting space in relationships
September 13, 2018 at 7:14 am
I just feel like I want to get some space from my family and relatives, but not to the point of cutting relationships entirely.
The reason for this (or one of the reasons) might be our differences. I love them, yet I sometimes feel like I don't belong.
Dad told me that he wants us to be a united family, but I want a little less contact with him and the others.
Am I wrong for wanting less contact?
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 13, 2018 at 7:19 am
I'd say you're pretty normal. If you can pay your way, take a break. If you can't, hang in there until you can.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 13, 2018 at 7:23 am
It’s perfectly normal to want some space. The problem being that when we want space most (typically between 13-20) we can’t really get that space because of being dependent on the parentals.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 13, 2018 at 8:35 pm
I need a LOT of space in relationships - probably in large part because I'm Asperger. People are going vary in how much space they want/need but I would consider it a base need - something you are definitely not wrong to want.
Between this post and many of your prior posts, your dad sounds like someone I would need space from measured in hundreds of kilometers.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 10:40 am
Read a sci-fi novel together.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 10:50 am
Seems normal to me but I’m not exactly the poster boy for “normal” social and familial relationships.
Personally I’ve backed off from my family a good bit, the main reasons being that I enjoy what solitude I get and that I want to live my own life. They are constantly around each other (this applies less to my Mom, Dad, but more to the slew of step-siblings) going to all the kids ball games and every minor event.
That’s not my jam, I don’t expect that level of participation from them in my own kids lives. I’m the parent, let me raise my kiddos, being there for major events only is just fine with me. I don’t enjoy many social functions either, and the thought of having to constantly be around them (even though I really do care) is tiring. So I backed off a bit, to their irritation it seems but it’s my life not theirs.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 11:32 am
Wanting space from parents at your age is normal.
Get a really good set of head phones or start getting stoned on a regular basis.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 1:41 pm
(September 13, 2018 at 7:14 am)Die Atheistin Wrote: I just feel like I want to get some space from my family and relatives, but not to the point of cutting relationships entirely.
The reason for this (or one of the reasons) might be our differences. I love them, yet I sometimes feel like I don't belong.
Dad told me that he wants us to be a united family, but I want a little less contact with him and the others.
Am I wrong for wanting less contact?
God, no. I need room or I'll suffocate sometimes. I also need my family, so it swings in either direction from time to time.
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 2:44 pm
(September 14, 2018 at 1:41 pm)Shell B Wrote: (September 13, 2018 at 7:14 am)Die Atheistin Wrote: I just feel like I want to get some space from my family and relatives, but not to the point of cutting relationships entirely.
The reason for this (or one of the reasons) might be our differences. I love them, yet I sometimes feel like I don't belong.
Dad told me that he wants us to be a united family, but I want a little less contact with him and the others.
Am I wrong for wanting less contact?
God, no. I need room or I'll suffocate sometimes. I also need my family, so it swings in either direction from time to time.
Meh. Having a very ex wife, I find the solo life cathartic
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RE: Getting space in relationships
September 14, 2018 at 2:53 pm
(This post was last modified: September 14, 2018 at 2:54 pm by Whateverist.)
(September 14, 2018 at 1:41 pm)Shell B Wrote: (September 13, 2018 at 7:14 am)Die Atheistin Wrote: I just feel like I want to get some space from my family and relatives, but not to the point of cutting relationships entirely.
The reason for this (or one of the reasons) might be our differences. I love them, yet I sometimes feel like I don't belong.
Dad told me that he wants us to be a united family, but I want a little less contact with him and the others.
Am I wrong for wanting less contact?
God, no. I need room or I'll suffocate sometimes. I also need my family, so it swings in either direction from time to time.
I can relate too. The very best solution for me has been to be with someone who is as involved in their own projects and as in need of their own space as I am. That she frequently enough travels on business is a bonus since it gives me periodic alone space for days at a time which I find refreshing. Since I'm more of a homebody because of the dogs and garden, it helps that she needs to travel some.
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