Confessions of a two-cult survivor

[TwoCultSurvivor]

Welcome, TwoCults! I don't know if you wanna give Scientology a whirl, but you know the saying: "third time's the charm."

I'm gonna pass on that.

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Welcome aboard!

Out of interest, I can see that you were born in the JW's, but why did you go into other cults/religions following getting out of that in particular? Did you feel the need to, or were you "convinced" to join by people/information that they had?

Well, it's a bit of a long story, but I'll try to be brief.

The problem with my JW experience is that I didn't decide to join and I didn't decide to leave. I never thought of them as a cult, despite what some of my friends tried to tell me as I got older (age 11 or 12).
I "left" because my parents divorced and JW's frown on divorce, so we all stopped going.

It wasn't like I decided to leave because it made no sense.

It wasn't until I joined the second group, The Way, that I began to look at the JW's critically. So I judged the JW religion from the framework of my new religion, which was just as wacky, but in different areas.

The Way and the JW's had a lot in common. They don't believe Jesus is God. They don't believe in immediate life after death. But the similarities pretty much end there. Where the JW's were very strict and legal, the Way was very permissive and forgiving. They smoked. They drank. They swore. And I didn't realize it at the time, but they were "looser" in other areas as well.

I even left that religion involuntarily: They had one of those schisms, and I stuck with a group that schismed out. Stuck with that group for about 8 years or so, give or take. I don't have a solid "I left on" date. It was gradual. My own divorce in the late 1990s had me, well, disaffected with the fellowship. I tried to make sense of the Bible on my own. Then I encountered an online group of former followers of The Way. That helped.

I didn't recognize myself as an atheist until relatively recently -- about five years ago. Off topic for your question, so I'll stop there.

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Oh, I didn't quite answer: I was lured into The Way the old-fashioned way. A friend of mine started sharing their teachings with me and I was impressed, so I started going to their fellowships (they were home based) and I really liked the feeling of family. That, and they weren't so full of themselves or holier-than-thou. At least, that's what I thought then.

I've not gone into their real problems. Another time. You didn't ask me why I left, after all.

[OakTree500]

Thank you for replying

[TwoCultSurvivor]

We joke around about what it means to be in a cult as opposed to a religion, but there are differences.

Cults are MUCH more isolating, in ways you may not recognize at first. They are VERY into identification with the GROUP, as opposed to identification as a believer or as a Christian.

I supposed it's easier to tell with a Jehovah's Witness, because they have such stand-out-ing behavior (I was going to say outstanding, but that would not have conveyed the right message). 

The Way was different. Their recruitment strategy was different. It wasn't about trying to talk people into it.

I'll contrast: A Jehovah's Witness will knock on your door and, effectively, dare you to prove him wrong. They thrive on the listener's lack of preparation. They know the Bible better than 95% of their targets ever will. And they are prepared for the battle of verses. They know verses you've never heard of, and it all ties into their theology. Their questions are designed to lead into their doctrines. They have prepared for your objections. 


The Way's approach was more emotional. They wanted you to know how much God loves you. He's interested in you. He needs your help! God has no hands but our hands... He empowers you with his very nature! 

Yes, the two groups have some peculiar doctrine in common. Peculiar doctrine helps you stand out from other groups. Sure, that other group says God needs you too, but they think Jesus is God. We know better. They think the dead are alive now. We know better. They think speaking in tongues is a gift to the few. We know better -- we know its a manifestation that can be exercised by every single believer [spoiler alert: we faked it. Every last one of us. They taught us HOW to fake it, and we fell for it. But not one of us ever produced an actual language].

What happens in a cult is, you identify first and foremost with the cult, and secondarily (if at all) with the religion.

Yeah, I know, the same thing happens with Catholics. But here's the difference: most people who say they are Catholic can't name five things that differentiate their religion from Lutherans.

I can name 25 distinctions between the Way and Catholicism without waking up.

A follower can be cultic about any religion. If you think that cracker turns into the literal body if Christ, you're a cult member. You're also certifiable.

The difference with a real cult is, that kind of lunacy is a defining characteristic of its members, not an anomaly.

[I started a thread on "Ask a..." to continue the conversation, if anyone is interested.