Do you have friends who don’t share your political views?

[Losty]

I watched a clip from Bill Maher the other day that said something about how we would do better breaching the devise if we avoid political discussion altogether. I think he made a good point. Most adults are not going to change their minds about politics. Sure if you really want to discuss it then you should go for it, but if your goal is to find common ground with someone who does not share your political views your best bet is to avoid politics. My guess is that most of my afk friends are Republicans. I could be wrong but I just assume they are because it’s South Georgia. We get by just fine without ever mentioning politics, but I feel like if the subject ever came up it could be something that would at least change our friendship if not ruin it. Anyway, enough rambling from me. Do you have friends that don’t share your political views? If so, do you talk to them about politics?

[John V]

Couldn't vote, because my answer would be "Maybe - we don't discuss politics."

If we don't discuss it, I don't know if theirs are different.

[The Grand Nudger]

@OP Q

Pretty much all of them, yeah.  The vast majority of my friends IRL are rightwing christian conservatives.  A significant portion of my family, likewise..the same.  

Just a consequence of being cracker who moved out into hillbilly country.

[Whateverist]

I watched a clip from Bill Maher the other day that said something about how we would do better breaching the devise if we avoid political discussion altogether. I think he made a good point. Most adults are not going to change their minds about politics. Sure if you really want to discuss it then you should go for it, but if your goal is to find common ground with someone who does not share your political views your best bet is to avoid politics. My guess is that most of my afk friends are Republicans. I could be wrong but I just assume they are because it’s South Georgia. We get by just fine without ever mentioning politics, but I feel like if the subject ever came up it could be something that would at least change our friendship if not ruin it. Anyway, enough rambling from me. Do you have friends that don’t share your political views? If so, do you talk to them about politics?

Some but I don't seek it out.  We mostly avoid discussing politics but occasionally I'll look for ways to talk about it but that obviously makes people uncomfortable.  Both sides have extremes associated with them which do not apply to everyone of that persuasion.  I would love to make more headway with this than I have.  By comparison I find religion easy.

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@OP Q

Pretty much all of them, yeah.  The vast majority of my friends IRL are rightwing christian conservatives.  A significant portion of my family, likewise..the same.  

Just a consequence of being cracker who moved out into hillbilly country.

In areas where conservatism predominates would you start out as such as one usually does with religion before discarding it?  But I know you moved around some growing up as I did.  I think living in different places where different assumptions are in play makes you aware that some things others don't think of as mutable really are.

[The Grand Nudger]

Yeah, military baby, born on a base, then I served myself.  Even there, there's a preponderance of conservatives.  I do agree, though, that travel can be the cure to myopia.

[Whateverist]

Yeah, military baby, born on a base, then I served myself.  Even there, there's a preponderance of conservatives.  I do agree, though, that travel can be the cure to myopia.

Right, me too.  Military isn't a bastion of liberalism but exposure, especially when young, to differences does seem to be a cure.

[Angrboda]

I don't know that people are going to change their minds if you talk to them but I'm pretty sure of what is not going to happen if you don't talk to them. People think that changing people only counts if the other person makes a sea change. An individual may be more inclined to take their empty candy wrapper and seek out a trash receptacle simply because someone talked to them about the horrible conditions in our cities and the things we can do to make them better. It's not big change, but it is change, and small change adds up. And one assumes that it is the other who should be doing the changing in such discussions. A discussion about politics and government may lead to us changing our views on those subjects. If anything, that kind of change is more valuable than that of the other changing to meet our way of viewing things. It's true that political discussions can be difficult and are known to escalate quickly. When it comes to delicate relationships where there are other priorities which take precedence, sure, avoidance may be one way of managing those aspects of political discussion. But where such things are not operative, it becomes merely a matter of convenience and avoidance merely on account of the unpleasantness that might result as a consequence of doing so. But here's the thing. It is the importance of political views and beliefs which makes them fraught with difficulty. But that means it is also important that we have such discussions so that collectively we can move forward in our politics. The one doesn't come without the other. So while it may be prudent to avoid politics with family or co-workers, I think as a general strategy it is misguided. And seeing that we are on a forum where mechanisms, both implicit and explicit, for handling and managing the inevitable conflicts exists, I think avoiding political discussions because of the potential for conflict alone is silly.

I'll simply tell a couple stories because everybody likes a story. Someone recently related an event to me which I hope I won't be betraying any confidence by retelling. This person was in a shop and she remembered that she had an uber driver who was imminently due. She showed the picture of the uber driver to those she was with, and they reacted with shock and prejudice because the driver was obviously of middle eastern descent. Now, I don't know where the conversation went from there, but it was pointed out that people naturally just assume that you are like them, and so if they are racist, you are naturally gonna assume that everyone else in their sphere is racist too. Now if this person had simply made the other person aware that not everyone was racist like them, that alone would have accomplished something, as it would encourage them to be more limited in their displays of racism and also less likely to simply project their racist values onto others in the future. Who knows, that might prompt one of them to talk about such things with someone close to them leading them to discover that even family doesn't necessarily share their racist views. If we don't talk about these things, none of that is going to happen and people are going to continue to live in ideological bubbles created by their own imagination.

The other story relates to a discussion that I had with alpha male. In a discussion about tariffs, I pointed out that the U.S. had recently passed a massive tax cut which effectively subsidized U.S. businesses and provided an unfair advantage to U.S. corporations in trade. He pointed out that the corporate tax rate in the U.S. had been much higher than that in other countries, so it's possible that rather than providing an unfair advantage to U.S. businesses, it simply leveled the playing field. Now I don't know that he succeeded in completely changing my mind on the matter. Liberals can be just as stubborn as conservatives. But he at least provided me with new ideas that I can use to shape my views of trade and the tax cut in a direction that is both more realistic, as well as likely to result in more consensus on such things with people from across the aisle. So while I wasn't greatly changed, at least in that one small area, change did occur.

One final point which just occurred to me. It may just be this morning or it may be a general trend, but this morning I have spent a good bit of time calling out people for things I am sympathetic with and normally would simply ignore among those who actually share my views on most things. Our discussions with people who view things radically differently than we do may not result in immediate change of their views, but it quite possibly can have a ripple effect, such as my challenging the sloppy arguments and assertions of those whose views I might otherwise be inclined to simply rubber-stamp in the name of group cohesion. This effect is smaller and less obvious, but nonetheless important.

[Catholic_Lady]

When I was in high school pretty much everyone I hung out with was irreligious and more liberal than myself. I'd like to think it taught me to be tolerant of opposing views pretty early on. Now a days, being in the military, I am mostly surrounded by the opposite. Religious people (a lot of Mormons) and people who tend to be more conservative than myself and voted for Trump.

Both groups include mostly fine people, each with their own reasons for believing as they do, and I'm fine being friends with either of them. Just as much as I am with a more centrist type like myself.

With that being said, we mostly don't talk about politics and I mainly know of their views because of seeing their posts on Facebook, or passing comments here and there. Our friendships don't revolve around it one way or another and theres much more to people besides their political views.

[A Theist]

In a Warehouse setting that I work in I have a lot of friends with a wide range of political views and also of those who have no interest in politics or in voting at all. There's times when some of us may debate and argue politics in the same way we argue sports, but it's all light hearted and nobody gets mad at each other. Every other Friday we'll still meet at the Birch for beers and have a good time. So at least with the group of friends I have there, political differences doesn't affect our relationships. Jumping on somebody else's Reach Truck there, that's a whole different ball of wax.

[tackattack]

I’m all for discussing anything openly, honestly and directly. I’m not usually a small talk person. That being, said I probably have much fewer conversations generally. I’ve learned most opinion changing conversations when people are seeking enough input to bring it up themselves.