Inceldom

[FrustratedFool]

Thread is about incels, who do indeed seem to blame others and exude entitlement.

Indeed, that's pretty much the definition of incel.

The definition of incel (misnomer though it is) is simply an involuntary celibate. Many vocal incels are the blame others variety. But plenty aren't.

Maybe we need to have an agreed upon set of terms here?

[Thumpalumpacus]

Tell it to him. I'm no apologist trying to muddy the waters.

FF is certainly not an apologist trying to muddy the waters. 

In the post you replied to, he is pointing out that not all lonely people blame others for their loneliness. In other words, many lonely people are not incels.

Read upthread to see where I'm coming from. Suffice it to say I heartily disagree with your opinion.

[Mister Agenda]

Indeed, that's pretty much the definition of incel.

The definition of incel (misnomer though it is) is simply an involuntary celibate.  Many vocal incels are the blame others variety.  But plenty aren't.

Maybe we need to have an agreed upon set of terms here?

I would say an incel is someone who is involuntarily celibate who also identifies as an incel; which implies a level of greivance beyond just being lonely and sexually frustrated.

[FrustratedFool]

Because the term incel has become so ubiquitous in modern culture, especially on the net, I've met many self declared incels who had no such grievance.

It has simply become a weaponised and pejorative term for any lonely depressed person, and self-deprecating people use it of themselves.

Again, I suggest we decide upon a number of terms we can use more fairly. I will offer some in a future post.

[FrustratedFool]

A possible list of terms:

From my internet explorations these are terms in currency at present, I think:

Blue Pill - a man who sees dating and relationships largely through the lens of a traditional sentimentality espoused by Hollywood: love wins; there's someone for everyone; looks don't matter anywhere near as much as personality; if you're a good person you will be loved; lonely people are lonely because of their own character defects

Red Pill - a man who views relationships through a sexist, often traditionally madculine, lens that sees women's dating behaviour almost entirely in terms of hypergamous mate selection, and so believes the way to succeed in dating is to maximise one's sexual market-place value by becoming wealthy and high status most of all, secondarily hyper-confident and masculine, thirdly having a muscular physique. Monogamy is seen as a game for losers. Extreme versions hold to political sexism such as removing women's votes or worse.

Purple Pill - someone who mixes the blue and red pill ideas. A romantic who hasn't given up on monogamy, but who holds that women are mostly attracted to status etc.

PUA - usually a red pill man who believes that dating success is really a game and about numbers and tactics. They employ various techniques to try and have casual sex with as many women as possible. Some are highly successful, most aren't.

Black Pill - people who see dating successful as primarily a matter of luck, in that the primary factor is physical appearance (genetically determined to a large degree), and secondarily a matter for whether one is neurodiverse or not. If you have bad genes you will struggle to be desired, if you have good genes you will find it easy. Personality, status, wealth, confidence etc matter far less than looks, and due to the halo effect are often misattributed anyway. And even if you have something like confidence or wealth, that too has come about largely through luck and looks. Often a hopeless outlook on being able to change.

Incel - although standing for involuntarily celibate, what it actually appears to refer to is someone who is unable to receive mutually attracted sexual validation. Some are red pulled, some are black pilled, but nearly all belueve their specific situation is hopeless. Many (though not all) tend to be very sexust, bitter, angry, and entitled. Some will advocate for sex as a human right or believe women should be given fewer rights to force a social situation where sex would be more available to them. Many appear mentally ill. Some are violent. However, the term is so commonly used now that it is over used and can refer to pretty much anyone who is struggling with dating.

Truecel-slang for someone who is lonely and massively struggles with dating primarily because of their undeniably ugly physical looks (seen through a black pill lens)

Mentalcel- slang for someone who struggles as above, but not because they're ugly but because they are neurodivergent or mentally ill.

Femcel- a female incel

It seems to me that many fall between such internet terms. That someone can be lonely and struggle with dating,perhaps a truecel or mentalcel, without being any of the other things. Or that someone can hold to a blue or black pill idea without being bitter or sexist even whilst having a very difficult time with dating or solitude.

[no one]

All poodles are dogs, not all dogs are poodles.

[Angrboda]

You've obviously given this a lot of thought.

[Silver]

There is no illegitimacy in how no one perceives himself.

And I won't pretend at pity, because it's undeserved. He is who he is, and I like him this way.

[The Grand Nudger]

Being unlucky in dating, or any of these stated combo circumstances, just makes a person completely fucking normal. Chad and Stacy are also unlucky in dating. Ask em. Normalizing incel shit is just that, nothing else, and not worth entertaining.

I'll return to my very first comment on this. There's not even such a thing as an incel. None of them - not a one, are involuntarily celibate. Girls very voluntarily don't want to fuck them, as they make themselves very voluntarily unfuckable.

The end.

[arewethereyet]

I'm gonna have to get a laminated cheat sheet to carry with me.