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Favorite Quotes by Comedians
#21
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
Alonzo Bodden Wrote:I work out with alot of gay guys at the gym. I do, because my only goal is to get into "gay shape". Now, you know what I'm talking about. Gay men are the most ripped kind of....listen.....I don't know how strong you have to be to blow a guy, but I'm guessin', there is some muscle involved.
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#22
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
I couldn't find this written out so here is Jim Jeffries (Aussie comic) on religion....and pandas.




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#23
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
"Guns don't kill people. Actually, they do. They're the number one cause of gun-related death".-Daniel Tosh
Don’t ask.

Atheist
I Evolved!
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#24
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
Also:
"My credit is so bad, Mastercard is sending me bills in Spanish"-Matt Fulchiron
Don’t ask.

Atheist
I Evolved!
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#25
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
" I don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die."
Live every day as if already dead, that way you're not disappointed when you are. Big Grin
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#26
RE: Favorite Quotes by Comedians
(June 3, 2011 at 11:37 pm)JohnDG Wrote: " I don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die."

Ahh... you must be referring to the last Human we interrogated Heart

We wondered what the affect of constantly bleeding profusely out of one's lower abdomen has on the psyche... and needless to say that despite the hundreds of gallons of blood spent (we opted to recycle it for the least important beings in my galaxy): we were very satisfied with the result of the "Eternal Hemorrhage" Heart
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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