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For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 29, 2011 at 10:21 pm
(This post was last modified: July 29, 2011 at 10:40 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
On the Effect of Religious Imagery in the Growth of Indeterminate Tomatoes
D. Tyler, Honeystone Farms LLC, 2011
The purpose of this experiment is to determine the effect of religious imagery on the growth of Lycopersicon esculentum.
-The working space for this experiment will be the Honeystone Farms "Concept Garden" Patch, USDA Ag Zone 6, soil type common to the Bluegrass region of Kentucky.
-Assorted pesticides, fungicides, and fertilizers will be on hand and leveraged to bring the experiment to completion
-6ft tomato stakes and jute braid twine will be used to form a "florida staking" trellis.
-A wide range of weather related instrumentation will be employed on site, in addition to regional weather monitoring by the N.W.S.
-Various forms and data keeping equipment
Specimens will be planted along a trellis line, two(2) per support stake with various religious imagery impressed upon the ground at the base of the trellis supports. There will be four(4) subsets within Test Group 1.
-SS1A: A Cross
-SS1B: A Star of David
-SS1C: A Crescent Moon
-SS1D: A random compression pattern (to act as an indicator of a false positive).
After the imagery has been pressed into the ground, and the tomatoes transplanted, a covering of topsoil will be loosely thrown over the entirety of the growing bed to conceal the imagery beneath. A second researcher, with no knowledge of the placement of the imagery within the growing bed, or the selection of tomatoes beside each image will be employed in collecting data regarding growth, health, and pressure from pests. Including an accounting of the total yield by subset and as a whole.
All data will be checked against a second group, Test Group 2, which will serve as a control. The methods and inputs used in the production of Test Group 2 will be identical to those used in Test Group 1 with the exception of compression patterns in the form of religious imagery. This group will serve as Control.
The Better Boy Hybrid variety of Lycopersicon esculentum has been chosen due to its vining growth habit, and manageable mature size. The fruits of this variety are also a highly prized agricultural commodity; proof of concept would imply potential for profit that could attract investors willing to provide capital for more exhaustive research into the subject utilizing a more appropriately sized test group.
A full accounting of this experiment, Including photos, raw data, and specific protocol information will be released as a PDF upon completion of the experiment. The experiment will begin 7/29/2011 and conclude no later than 10/10/2011, with results being released to interested parties in the format described above no later than 12/10/2011.
(Will Add Pictures as I get them hosted)
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 29, 2011 at 10:31 pm
This sounds as if it is about fucking plants?
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 29, 2011 at 10:39 pm
lol, yeah, I'm planting my last run of tomatoes for late fall harvest and I figured I could get some value added laughs to go with my marinara.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 30, 2011 at 12:37 am
(July 29, 2011 at 10:21 pm)Rhythm Wrote: On the Effect of Religious Imagery in the Growth of Indeterminate Tomatoes
D. Tyler, Honeystone Farms LLC, 2011
The purpose of this experiment is to determine the effect of religious imagery on the growth of Lycopersicon esculentum.
-The working space for this experiment will be the Honeystone Farms "Concept Garden" Patch, USDA Ag Zone 6, soil type common to the Bluegrass region of Kentucky.
-Assorted pesticides, fungicides, and fertilizers will be on hand and leveraged to bring the experiment to completion
-6ft tomato stakes and jute braid twine will be used to form a "florida staking" trellis.
-A wide range of weather related instrumentation will be employed on site, in addition to regional weather monitoring by the N.W.S.
-Various forms and data keeping equipment
Specimens will be planted along a trellis line, two(2) per support stake with various religious imagery impressed upon the ground at the base of the trellis supports. There will be four(4) subsets within Test Group 1.
-SS1A: A Cross
-SS1B: A Star of David
-SS1C: A Crescent Moon
-SS1D: A random compression pattern (to act as an indicator of a false positive).
After the imagery has been pressed into the ground, and the tomatoes transplanted, a covering of topsoil will be loosely thrown over the entirety of the growing bed to conceal the imagery beneath. A second researcher, with no knowledge of the placement of the imagery within the growing bed, or the selection of tomatoes beside each image will be employed in collecting data regarding growth, health, and pressure from pests. Including an accounting of the total yield by subset and as a whole.
All data will be checked against a second group, Test Group 2, which will serve as a control. The methods and inputs used in the production of Test Group 2 will be identical to those used in Test Group 1 with the exception of compression patterns in the form of religious imagery. This group will serve as Control.
The Better Boy Hybrid variety of Lycopersicon esculentum has been chosen due to its vining growth habit, and manageable mature size. The fruits of this variety are also a highly prized agricultural commodity; proof of concept would imply potential for profit that could attract investors willing to provide capital for more exhaustive research into the subject utilizing a more appropriately sized test group.
A full accounting of this experiment, Including photos, raw data, and specific protocol information will be released as a PDF upon completion of the experiment. The experiment will begin 7/29/2011 and conclude no later than 10/10/2011, with results being released to interested parties in the format described above no later than 12/10/2011.
(Will Add Pictures as I get them hosted)
Love it 
I take it you won't be using pesticides on any of the test groups? Comparing No pesticides + religious imagery, no pesticides no imagery and pesticides no imagery will be too much work, but it would definitely be a good way to plug modern technology.
.
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 30, 2011 at 12:47 am
Are you bored? I will actually be interested, though probably not surprised, to see how this turns out. I'm sorry, but I hope the imagery kills your tomatoes. That will make an interesting article.
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 30, 2011 at 12:58 am
I will help you get this on topic.
![[Image: 7701765v4_480x480_Front_Color-White_padT...e-true.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=images5.cpcache.com%2Fproduct_zoom%2F7701765v4_480x480_Front_Color-White_padToSquare-true.jpg)
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 30, 2011 at 3:00 am
Tomatoes are, all of them, sacred. For they are used in the blessed non-sacriligeious pizza.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 30, 2011 at 10:25 am
Please Rhythm, keep us updated! I really want to hear how this one turns out
When I was young, there was a god with infinite power protecting me. Is there anyone else who felt that way? And was sure about it? but the first time I fell in love, I was thrown down - or maybe I broke free - and I bade farewell to God and became human. Now I don't have God's protection, and I walk on the ground without wings, but I don't regret this hardship. I want to live as a person. -Arina Tanemura
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 31, 2011 at 8:07 am
Looks like you have too much time on your hands.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.
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RE: For Shits and Giggles (But I'm actually doing this)
July 31, 2011 at 12:39 pm
(This post was last modified: July 31, 2011 at 12:40 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
Nothing if not time friend. I have encountered a snag, and may have to scramble to the garden center to buy more tomatoes. Still need to get out there and get pictures. All of the Tomatoes in Test Group 1 appear to be dying. Something is attacking the roots.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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