I think everyone in this thread is quite aware of what victim blaming is. The issue is that some don’t agree with calling this event a sexual assault.

Thread needs to die though imo. Everything’s been said.

(January 19, 2018 at 3:56 pm)Shell B Wrote: Young children seeing that is the exception, not the rule. It's generally considered by people who are non-Catholic that kids seeing porn is bad, and showing kids porn is grooming, which is considerably worse. The majority of porn users are sexually mature adults or teens who snuck it.

Like When me and my cousin at 8 snuck into my uncle's vhs porn stash and watched.

We were like "why the fuck are they naked and bundled up like that? Ohhh... Never knew my willie can also do that! But why?"

Forget us men. Here's a piece containing various opinions by women (some in support of one side of the debate, some the other side, and the rest in between) on this specific case:

How 18 women responded to ‘Grace’ and the Aziz Ansari allegation

(January 21, 2018 at 6:14 am)Thena323 Wrote: A little light reading for you good folks who insist that BOTH parties should've "done better" in regards to this matters.
http://www.southernct.edu/sexual-misconduct/facts.html

An excerpt:

Quote:Why Is It Dangerous?
Victim-blaming attitudes marginalize the victim/survivor and make it harder to come forward and report the abuse. If the survivor knows that you or society blames her for the abuse, s/he will not feel safe or comfortable coming forward and talking to you.
Victim-blaming attitudes also reinforce what the abuser has been saying all along; that it is the victim’s fault this is happening. It is NOT the victim’s fault or responsibility to fix the situation; it is the abuser’s choice. By engaging in victim-blaming attitudes, society allows the abuser to perpetrate relationship abuse or sexual assault while avoiding accountability for his/her actions.

What Does Victim-Blaming Look Like?
Example of Victim-Blaming Attitude: “She must have provoked him into being abusive. They both need to change.”
Reality: This statement assumes that the victim is equally to blame for the abuse, when in reality, abuse is a conscious choice made by the abuser. Abusers have a choice in how they react to their partner’s actions. Options besides abuse include: walking away, talking in the moment, respectfully explaining why an action is frustrating, breaking up, etc. Additionally, abuse is not about individual actions that incite the abuser to hurt his partner, but rather about the abuser’s feelings of entitlement to do whatever he wants to his partner.
When friends and family remain neutral about the abuse and say that both people need to change, they are colluding with and supporting the abusive partner and making it less likely that the survivor will seek support.

It is dismissive, and indeed CLASSIC victim blaming.

Oh, shut up, Thena. /thread

(January 21, 2018 at 7:30 am)Longhorn Wrote: I think everyone in this thread is quite aware of what victim blaming is. The issue is that some don’t agree with calling this event a sexual assault.

Thread needs to die though imo. Everything’s been said.

Yep, that's been the same since page 1. And of course we agree that Aziz's behavior is shitty, just that it wasn't a crime.

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(January 21, 2018 at 7:33 am)LastPoet Wrote:

(January 19, 2018 at 3:56 pm)Shell B Wrote: Young children seeing that is the exception, not the rule. It's generally considered by people who are non-Catholic that kids seeing porn is bad, and showing kids porn is grooming, which is considerably worse. The majority of porn users are sexually mature adults or teens who snuck it.

Like When me and my cousin at 8 snuck into my uncle's vhs porn stash and watched.

We were like "why the fuck are they naked and bundled up like that? Ohhh... Never knew my willie can also do that! But why?"

It's a lot more accessible now because of the internet.

http://m.huffingtonpost.ca/2016/07/08/ki...90878.html

(January 21, 2018 at 7:23 am)alpha male Wrote: To blame a victim, you actually need a victim.

You can't decide that, since you were not there.

Neither was anybody on the "other side" of this debate. There is no definitive victim or non-victim, so people can't be said to be "victim-blaming." If it turns out she was definitively assaulted, we'd have another attitude. Furthermore, no one is blaming her. They're not saying, "It's your fault such and such happened to you." They are questioning whether it was assault based on her and his actions, which is how you analyze any scenario like this. To victim blame, you have to say something like, "It's her fault she had that dick in her face because she was wearing a short skirt." not, "It's unclear whether this is assault because she appears to have given consent and then decided later that she didn't consent." (I'm not going to argue whether anyone's interpretations of the events is the same as mine. We've been over this.) What revived this thread was a wall of text aimed aimed at insulting those who disagree.

(January 21, 2018 at 11:10 am)Shell B Wrote:

(January 21, 2018 at 6:14 am)Thena323 Wrote: A little light reading for you good folks who insist that BOTH parties should've "done better" in regards to this matters.
http://www.southernct.edu/sexual-misconduct/facts.html

An excerpt:


It is dismissive, and indeed CLASSIC victim blaming.

Oh, shut up, Thena. /thread

In order for any of the above to be relevant to this specific case, you’d need to establish that there was a victim, lol.

You can't EVER question that there was a victim! That makes you an evil, victim-blaming bitchface.

Last person to posts wins! Wait, this is that thread, right?