It's just a suggestion based on my own personal experiences.
I respect your views and everyone else's.

(October 2, 2014 at 7:10 am)Losty Wrote: I still think you can be nicer and more sensitive about it. You know that whole "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" thing...

I don't think I'm insensitive, I just say what needs to be said. That the events were actually not very important and that innocent people shouldn't be blamed. There may be guilty people in this guy's life, but innocent people like the guy in the band shirts who haven't done anything wrong shouldn't be blamed or hated. From what the op said he certainly didn't want to to make the op feel hurt or devalued in any way.

*And also the rest of that stuff in the op is perfectly normal. It's normal to feel nervous at times, etc.

I don't know about everyone, but most on this thread are not licensed health professionals, or psychics. We cannot give him the help he needs even if we knew his exact situation, all we can do is give him our thoughts and perspectives on the situation, and hope one of the advice clicks with him.

From my personal experience, not saying anything only helps to increase depression, and the best counter against depression is to try and get their mind off of things. He might feel that we do not understand how he feels, and he will be right, we cannot get inside his head, we each have our own lives, experiences and different take on things. So if somebody sits beside him and comforts him, that might work, and if someone just slaps his back and drags him out, that might work too.

Lastly, in any of these situations, he is the only one who can help himself. It is his decision if he actually wants help or not, and if he will acknowledge that help or not. So instead of trying to help others in giving him advice, try giving him the advice yourself which you believe will be helpful.

(October 2, 2014 at 8:59 am)Aoi Magi Wrote: I don't know about everyone, but most on this thread are not licensed health professionals, or psychics.

From my personal experience, not saying anything only helps to increase depression, and the best counter against depression is to try and get their mind off of things

I have a Dr, but not an MD, and it's in physics, not psychics. So close!

But more seriously, if it's some variety of clinical depression, it's a real disease which can't be treated by getting your mind off of things. So you have to be careful to distinguish between being pissed off, socially isolated and unhappy, and clinical depression.
Of course, it may very well not be that. I know i feel like stabbing people all the time recently because so many things are shit, and I also know that a change in perspective would help, I just didn't manage to figure out what I want yet. I can't speak for the OP though.