The other day, my dad was telling me how he can get me married if I want to and I cooperate and said if I don't say I'm not Muslim or I don't believe. I told him I can't change that and it's not that much in my control, he said, it is but if I want to be stubborn then I can be stubborn.

I left it that. Didn't really argue with him.

The funny thing is that I've gone through all sorts of reasons to believe in Islam, and through at this year became Muslim quite a few times. But those times are short lived and I end up not believing in Islam realizing it has problems and is not that convincing.

I'm not sure if my Dad just said that to put pressure on me to believe or that he actually thinks I'm being stubborn.

It would be more fair to the other person if they prefer a muslim spouse, that they know if you really are a muslim or not. Your dad is trying to give you more reason to convert, though. That's the real motive here, though I'm sure you realize that.

Have you at all considered the possibility that you may actually BE stubborn?

Boru

Actually your dad is just trying to get you married. Most parents in the world go through a certain phase where they just get crazy about marrying off their kids. They get even crazier if the kid is living with them. So if you are living with your parents, either move out, or get some ear plugs.

MK, you might actually be stubborn, who knows? Be true to yourself, though. Be who you are, and make no apologies for that.

(December 27, 2014 at 7:13 pm)Aoi Magi Wrote: Actually your dad is just trying to get you married. Most parents in the world go through a certain phase where they just get crazy about marrying off their kids. They get even crazier if the kid is living with them. So if you are living with your parents, either move out, or get some ear plugs.

I think you're right. Which makes me think he said that to put pressure on me to believe because he wants to get me to marry.

I don't have any thoughts or advice as I have never been in this situation. But, I can understand how difficult it must be to have any of this pressure. All I can do is offer my support.

Your parents are not you, you are not them.. No one has the right to pressure you into doing things you don't want to do. And having to pretend to be something you are not is no way to live anyway. If you and your dad have a close relationship, just tell him you love him no matter what, but only you get to decide whom you marry and only you get to decide what beliefs you hold.

Why isn't he being stubborn by insisting you profess belief in some medieval bullshit?

It's a two-way street.

(December 27, 2014 at 7:50 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Why isn't he being stubborn by insisting you profess belief in some medieval bullshit?

It's a two-way street.

I don't think it's stubbornness to believe in a religion and want your family to believe in the same religion. I just don't get why he would perceive me being stubborn regarding Islam, which makes me think, he just said that to pressure on me to believe to get me married.