Animal Psychic Conveys Cecil the Lion's Message to Humanity

[Mr.wizard]

Jeesh, I just spoke to my dead turtle, King Lettuce III. His words moved me to tears.

"DUDE, you should TOTALLY be an animal psychic. Dumb fucks will give you truckloads of money just for talking to their kittens. Wouldn't that be RAD?"

Lol, your turtle kind of sounds like Michelangelo from the ninja turtles.

[Longhorn]

I have just spoken with my dead fish......But I'd rather not repeat what the lil fucker said ಠ_ಠ

[Mr.wizard]

I just spoke with my dead dog and he didn't say anything an you want to know why?

Two reasons:

1. He's a dog
2. He's dead

[The Valkyrie]

"Being an animal psychic must be fun. You get to make up whatever shit you want, because the animal can't speak for itself."

Just like being the spokesperson for a deity, really...

[Alex K]

Cecil the Lion contacted the medium once again later that day for some more important things he had forgotten to mention the first time around. "Oh, by the way," he lets us know, " Gazelles are yummy, but a bit too lean for my taste. And you need at least three or you'll be hungry again in no time. If you sleep in the shade behind an Elephant, be careful to stay slightly to the side not in the middle, I know what I'm talking about. Hyënas are the shit, but don't tell that Disney. Buy organic - Buy local. I have the biggest shlong south of the river. Peace out - Cecil"

[Athene]

This woman is a fraud. Clearly those were the words of Aslan the lion. Or possibly Food Lion.

[Salacious B. Crumb]

Jeesh, I just spoke to my dead turtle, King Lettuce III. His words moved me to tears.

"DUDE, you should TOTALLY be an animal psychic. Dumb fucks will give you truckloads of money just for talking to their kittens. Wouldn't that be RAD?"

I just got a fortune cookie, and a dead cactus (Yes, I can speak to dead plants too. There may be a small market for plant whisperers too.) told me to play the lottery with those numbers.

Let's get started on our money-making adventures!

[brewer]

You want to know what is sad? My wife and I see these psychics all the time at large dog events that we attend. Even sadder, they do a decent amount of business. I've spoken to some that have paid for the service and at least half said they did it for shits and giggles. The rest either believed (some out of desperation because their dog was sick) or wouldn't talk about their experience.

Plus, you wouldn't believe how many are Dr's of homeopathy, naturopathy or chiropractic. Or maybe you would. Of course they all have their remedies that they push.

[Iroscato]

Ahhh, psychics.

I heard a couple of women exchanging medium stories on the bus the other day. It still seems to be as accepted by the general public as religion was around 150 years ago. It makes me sadface.

[Salacious B. Crumb]

You want to know what is sad? My wife and I see these psychics all the time at large dog events that we attend. Even sadder, they do a decent amount of business. I've spoken to some that have paid for the service and at least half said they did it for shits and giggles. The rest either believed (some out of desperation because their dog was sick) or wouldn't talk about their experience.

Plus, you wouldn't believe how many are Dr's of homeopathy, naturopathy or chiropractic. Or maybe you would. Of course they all have their remedies that they push.

That's the thing I don't get. If they have a problem with their pet, take it to the vet, not the charlatan pet psychic at a large dog convention.

I wonder how one becomes a pet psychic, and then becomes successful at it. It seems that that would be tough. I remember on the Animal Planet network, there was a sort of weird woman that did that, and I remember thinking that this person was full of shit. I was irritated when watching it, even when I was in my early teens. However, I did honestly believe in psychics, ghosts, alien abductions, bigfoot, exorcisms, and jeebus into my early 20's (jeebus was mid 20s), because I was raised by people that heavily believed what they saw on T.V., and naturally fell into the same pattern. Luckily, I don't believe in that stuff anymore. Too bad I can't say that for the ones who raised me.