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Current time: December 15, 2024, 5:45 pm

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joke time
RE: joke time
Another sign someone spends too much time on the web.

You tell them a joke IRL and instead of laughing, they say LOLROTFLMAO.

And if you grin, that's a sign that you spend too much time on the web.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Reply
RE: joke time
Rhonda, the wife likes me being on the net as much as possible.
She's not a true atheist me thinks.
Since I am, she knows I'll just go out and rape and murder otherwise.

What else is there for a godless heathen to do?

Beccs prefers pushing old ladies in front of buses but each to their own.
I won't judge...
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
Three nuns die and go to heaven. 
They arrive at the gate, and Petrus tells them that they can only come in, if they can answer a question.
So Petrus asks the first nun:
Who was the first man on Earth?
And the non says: “Oh, thats an easy one, it was Adam”
Bells ring, angels sing, and she goes to heaven.

And Petrus asks the second nun:
Who was the first woman on Earth?
And the non says: “Oh, thats an easy one, it was Eve”
Bells ring, angels sing, and she goes to heaven.

Finally Petrus asks the third nun:
What was the first words Eve sayd to Adam?
And the non says: “Oh, thats a hard one, ...”
Bells ring, angels sing, and she goes to heaven.
"Alone is what I have. Alone protects me." 
“I may be on the side of the angels but don’t think for one second that I am one of them.”
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery each day."
Reply
RE: joke time
I bought a porn flick, loaded it into the DVD player and sat to watch it. But all I saw was this guy in a dim room, sitting on a couch holding his dick.

Then I realised I'd forgotten to turn the TV on.
Reply
RE: joke time
Little known fact. Netflix started up it's own porn streaming, yep, they call it "NutFlix"
Reply
RE: joke time
(December 18, 2017 at 7:21 pm)ignoramus Wrote: Rhonda, the wife likes me being on the net as much as possible.
She's not a true atheist me thinks.
Since I am, she knows I'll just go out and rape and murder otherwise.

What else is there for a godless heathen to do?

Beccs prefers pushing old ladies in front of buses but each to their own.
I won't judge...

Isn't she concerned you might get on Ashley Madison and force passionate text on some unsuspecting theist reprobate?
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Reply
RE: joke time
She trusts me unconditionally!

(you free Sat night? Naughty)
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
(December 19, 2017 at 4:26 pm)ignoramus Wrote: She trusts me unconditionally!

(you free Sat night?  Naughty)

Trusts you to do what?
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Reply
RE: joke time
To be a caring loving faithful husband of course.

I do like to get fed you know!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
Jewish Cab Driver

A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York City.
The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.
He made no attempt to start the cab .The woman glared back at him and said, "What's wrong with you, honey? - Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?"
The old Jewish driver answered, "Let me tell you sumsing, lady – I vasn't staring at you like you tink; det vould not be proper vair I come from."
 
The drunk woman giggled and responded, "Well, if you're not staring at my boobs sweetie, what are you doing then?" He paused a moment, then told her...
 
"Vell, M'am, I am looking and I am looking, and I am tinking to myself,'Vair in da hell is dis lady keeping de money to pay for dis ride?
Reply



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