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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Jesus Thread

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Jesus Thread
Martian Mermaid Offline Donators
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#41
RE: Jesus Thread
March 23, 2018 at 12:52 am (This post was last modified: March 23, 2018 at 12:56 am by Martian Mermaid. Edit Reason: https://atheistforums.org/thread-54008.html )
(March 14, 2018 at 12:37 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: Jesus Thread is here to redeem you.

To save you from your sins.

Accept It into your lives and Jesus Thread will help balance you.

Can you go another day without Jesus Thread?

All those who want to repent, respond in the thread.

Ignore if your soul belongs to Satan Thread.  You may not see Satan Thread, but It's out there watching you.

And, one day, Jesus Thread will disappear, and no one will respond to It anymore.  But Jesus Thread would have died for you.  And, one day, It will be resurrected!

Well, Jesus Thread exists, it's right here in front of me. There is evidence. 

I am not so sure about this Satan thread though.
Edit: Oh, it exists too. Wasn't expecting that.
The bugle sounds as the charge begins

But on this battlefield no one wins

- Iron Maiden, The Trooper
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vorlon13 Offline
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#42
RE: Jesus Thread
March 23, 2018 at 7:46 pm
(March 20, 2018 at 7:33 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Endorsed by the man himself!

[Image: nZzPVRG.jpg]

Hell, that wimpy nail gun shoots nails that are SHORTER than the already almost too short nails the Romans specified.

You would have to pinch Jesus' skin around his edge and use a BUNCH of nails to get enough holding power. I'm trying to imagine a crucifix like that and it's disturbing . . . .
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
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#43
RE: Jesus Thread
March 23, 2018 at 7:58 pm
Just remember that 2,000 years ago people were much smaller.  Jesus would have been a featherweight, at best.  Probably had tiny little hands.... just like the WLB.

Probably had a tiny little dick, too.
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vulcanlogician Offline
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#44
RE: Jesus Thread
March 23, 2018 at 9:41 pm
Look! The Jesus thread is back! I thought it died three days ago...
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Minimalist Offline Donators
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#45
RE: Jesus Thread
March 23, 2018 at 9:47 pm
Resurrection, man.
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jaygreen Offline
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#46
RE: Jesus Thread
March 27, 2018 at 4:03 pm
I think you should all stop talking about Jesus, this is not the time or place.
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Silver Offline Donators
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#47
RE: Jesus Thread
March 27, 2018 at 4:06 pm
(March 27, 2018 at 4:03 pm)jaygreen Wrote: I think you should all stop talking about Jesus, this is not the time or place.

I think you need Jesus. Wink
"Never trust a fox. Looks like a dog, behaves like a cat."
~ Erin Hunter
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Antares Offline Donators
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#48
RE: Jesus Thread
March 27, 2018 at 4:38 pm
[Image: F7_E0_AE80_A1_FA_435_A_94_B3_BECDCC301415.jpg]
I believe in life before death.
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Fireball Offline
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#49
RE: Jesus Thread
March 27, 2018 at 5:44 pm
(March 27, 2018 at 4:03 pm)jaygreen Wrote: I think you should all stop talking about Jesus, this is not the time or place.

OK, dad. Rolleyes
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
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#50
RE: Jesus Thread
March 27, 2018 at 6:49 pm
(March 27, 2018 at 4:03 pm)jaygreen Wrote: I think you should all stop talking about Jesus, this is not the time or place.

True.

He does need to get back to work and mow my lawn!!

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Jesus Thread

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