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RE: joke time
May 5, 2020 at 9:40 am
Grandma's a bit senile now and she's been wandering off lately and we're all worried for her safety, so we tied a bell around her neck.
Probably sounds a little inhumane but now we can rest easy that she won't wander off anymore because that thing is fucking heavy.
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RE: joke time
May 5, 2020 at 5:38 pm
(May 5, 2020 at 9:40 am)Little lunch Wrote: Grandma's a bit senile now and she's been wandering off lately and we're all worried for her safety, so we tied a bell around her neck.
Probably sounds a little inhumane but now we can rest easy that she won't wander off anymore because that thing is fucking heavy.
Her nickname is now "Liberty Lady".
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
May 5, 2020 at 5:45 pm
(May 5, 2020 at 9:40 am)Little lunch Wrote: Grandma's a bit senile now and she's been wandering off lately and we're all worried for her safety, so we tied a bell around her neck.
Probably sounds a little inhumane but now we can rest easy that she won't wander off anymore because that thing is fucking heavy.
To keep fit, our gran started walking two miles a day on her 80th birthday.
She's 93 now and we don't know WHERE the hell she is.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
May 5, 2020 at 7:17 pm
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
May 5, 2020 at 8:32 pm
Electric toothbrushes may be the most pointless invention ever...how many people do you know with electric teeth?
Boru
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RE: joke time
May 6, 2020 at 7:48 am
I told my son that masturbating will make you go blind and he said, 'yeah, um, you're talking to a wall, I'm over here, dad'.
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RE: joke time
May 6, 2020 at 2:17 pm
Some people say that, in addition to blindness, chronic masturbation can lead to stuttering. How could anyone b-b-believe that?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
May 6, 2020 at 3:47 pm
(May 6, 2020 at 2:17 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Some people say that, in addition to blindness, chronic masturbation can lead to stuttering. How could anyone b-b-believe that?
Boru
Porky Pig agrees, I'm sure.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
May 6, 2020 at 4:58 pm
(May 6, 2020 at 3:47 pm)Fireball Wrote: (May 6, 2020 at 2:17 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Some people say that, in addition to blindness, chronic masturbation can lead to stuttering. How could anyone b-b-believe that?
Boru
Porky Pig agrees, I'm sure. 
That would explain why he’s always going about without his trousies, I suppose.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax