Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 11:28 am
I've decided to make a compilation list of things that I believe to not be discriminatory even if some people keep insisting on it... Here it is, enjoy.
On race:
- It's not racist to not want to date someone because of their race, as long as it's based on personal preference and not on the fact that you think your race is superior
- It's not racist to not want to date outside of your race because you want to preserve your ethnic origins, as long as you, once again, don't think your race must be preserved because it's superior (a good example are the Yamato, the primary ethnicity in Japan, they rarely date/marry/procreate outside of their race)
- It's not racist to point out problems with less discriminated against races (like whites)
- It's not racist to be against or not allow affirmative action
- It's not racist to not accept a job candidate of colour because of his low experience/skills - By analogy the same principle applies to everything else that denies a benefit to people of colour for valid reasons
On sexual orientation:
- Starting by the obvious - Not wanting to date someone of the same sex because you're straight is obviously not homophobic
- It's not homophobic to not publicly finance LGBT associations or organizations
- It's not homophobic for the government to allow groups with different views to express their views on homosexuality, it's basic human rights
- It's ok for religious people to not want to associated with gays, it's their right after all
- Homosexuals don't have the right to be married in church, and they shouldn't have
- It's ok to ask what asexuality is if you don't know what it is, it's not discrimination
- It's ok to ask someone if he/she is bisexual or gay if you are not sure
On gender identity:
- It's ok to not want to date someone because they are a trans, it's ok to not feel attracted to them, it's a preference and nothing else. I wouldn't date a trans woman, and it's my choice.
- It's ok to be confused about someone (if they are a boy or a girl) and ask it if it's not obvious by physical appearance
On being male:
- It's not sexist to recognize obvious physical and biological differences between males and females and even take advantage of them
- It's not sexist to criticize females who falsely accuse partners of rape, or females who rape (they exist!)
- It's not sexist to criticize feminazis
- It's not sexist to not want to date a dumb girl (this is my case), or a fat girl, or an unattractive girl, it's just a preference
- It's not sexist to be against affirmative action in favour of women
- It's not sexist if a videogame has no playable female characters, that depends on other factors (such as how women are portrayed)
- It's perfectly ok to not want to date someone who fucks a lot of people, this goes for men and women.
- It's not sexist to point out issues with men that are not treated - Such as male rape, male rape and problems inside prison, male depressions and suicides, the list goes on
On social status:
- It's ok to criticize someone who's poor and had lots of opportunities to climb the ladder
- It's ok to not hate rich people and think all of them are exploiting the rest of us, in fact I don't
- It's ok to criticize the amount of poor people who live on welfare and refuse to work (the case in my country)
- Being poor is not an excuse for everything wrong you do, and pointing out how wrong that is is not discriminatory
On body weight:
- It's not fatphobia to promote healthy lifestyles
- It's not faphobia to not want to date or feel attracted to fat people
- It's not fatphobia if you respectfully help someone who wants to lose weight and tell them some nice tips on how to do it correctly, as long as you don't fat shame them
- It's not fatphobia for a doctor to say that MAYBE your health problems could be linked to your weight
- It's not fatphobia if society doesn't agree with "fat is beautiful", just get over it
- It's not fatphobia if not all people want to remain fat and want to lose weight because there are advantages
Well I hope you enjoyed it.
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 11:32 am
(December 29, 2014 at 11:28 am)Blackout Wrote: I've decided to make a compilation list of things that I believe to not be discriminatory even if some people keep insisting on it... Here it is, enjoy.
On race:
- It's not racist to not want to date someone because of their race, as long as it's based on personal preference and not on the fact that you think your race is superior
- It's not racist to not want to date outside of your race because you want to preserve your ethnic origins, as long as you, once again, don't think your race must be preserved because it's superior (a good example are the Yamato, the primary ethnicity in Japan, they rarely date/marry/procreate outside of their race)
- It's not racist to point out problems with less discriminated against races (like whites)
- It's not racist to be against or not allow affirmative action
- It's not racist to not accept a job candidate of colour because of his low experience/skills - By analogy the same principle applies to everything else that denies a benefit to people of colour for valid reasons
On sexual orientation:
- Starting by the obvious - Not wanting to date someone of the same sex because you're straight is obviously not homophobic
- It's not homophobic to not publicly finance LGBT associations or organizations
- It's not homophobic for the government to allow groups with different views to express their views on homosexuality, it's basic human rights
- It's ok for religious people to not want to associated with gays, it's their right after all
- Homosexuals don't have the right to be married in church, and they shouldn't have
- It's ok to ask what asexuality is if you don't know what it is, it's not discrimination
- It's ok to ask someone if he/she is bisexual or gay if you are not sure
On gender identity:
- It's ok to not want to date someone because they are a trans, it's ok to not feel attracted to them, it's a preference and nothing else. I wouldn't date a trans woman, and it's my choice.
- It's ok to be confused about someone (if they are a boy or a girl) and ask it if it's not obvious by physical appearance
On being male:
- It's not sexist to recognize obvious physical and biological differences between males and females and even take advantage of them
- It's not sexist to criticize females who falsely accuse partners of rape, or females who rape (they exist!)
- It's not sexist to criticize feminazis
- It's not sexist to not want to date a dumb girl (this is my case), or a fat girl, or an unattractive girl, it's just a preference
- It's not sexist to be against affirmative action in favour of women
- It's not sexist if a videogame has no playable female characters, that depends on other factors (such as how women are portrayed)
- It's perfectly ok to not want to date someone who fucks a lot of people, this goes for men and women.
- It's not sexist to point out issues with men that are not treated - Such as male rape, male rape and problems inside prison, male depressions and suicides, the list goes on
On social status:
- It's ok to criticize someone who's poor and had lots of opportunities to climb the ladder
- It's ok to not hate rich people and think all of them are exploiting the rest of us, in fact I don't
- It's ok to criticize the amount of poor people who live on welfare and refuse to work (the case in my country)
- Being poor is not an excuse for everything wrong you do, and pointing out how wrong that is is not discriminatory
On body weight:
- It's not fatphobia to promote healthy lifestyles
- It's not faphobia to not want to date or feel attracted to fat people
- It's not fatphobia if you respectfully help someone who wants to lose weight and tell them some nice tips on how to do it correctly, as long as you don't fat shame them
- It's not fatphobia for a doctor to say that MAYBE your health problems could be linked to your weight
- It's not fatphobia if society doesn't agree with "fat is beautiful", just get over it
- It's not fatphobia if not all people want to remain fat and want to lose weight because there are advantages
Well I hope you enjoyed it.
I actually just wanted a few of the things on the first list to be admitted to be false rather than a whole new list.
Are you ready for the fire? We are firemen. WE ARE FIREMEN! The heat doesn’t bother us. We live in the heat. We train in the heat. It tells us that we’re ready, we’re at home, we’re where we’re supposed to be. Flames don’t intimidate us. What do we do? We control the flame. We control them. We move the flames where we want to. And then we extinguish them.
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 11:36 am (This post was last modified: December 29, 2014 at 11:40 am by Dystopia.)
I just did that to show I'm not hating on white, male, straight, cis males, because I am one myself. The fact I acknowledge my advantages doesn't mean I'm oblivious to obvious disadvantages or misconceptions.
All of the things I said were the advantages I have, and no I don't think they are false. It doesn't mean everything is perfect. I'm not interested in discussing further given that you seem to believe sexual objectification and beauty culture affects men as much as women which is clearly not the case
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 12:56 pm (This post was last modified: December 29, 2014 at 1:03 pm by Mister Agenda.)
(December 27, 2014 at 10:31 am)Rhythm Wrote: I don't seem to be enjoying all of those privileges in my life...............do I need a card or something so that everyone can clearly see that I belong to the club and should be treated with the deference due?
Do you enjoy some of them?
(December 27, 2014 at 10:45 am)Rhythm Wrote: No, Blackout, I really don't. I wouldn't go so far as to say that no one does, anywhere. Or that simply because I'm not privy to the party membership benefits they don't exist. After all, it's your list and a good portion of it will be specific to your situation and your culture. My list would be different...and probably shorter.
(ah public transportation..I actually miss that, limited as it is in the states.)
I'm interested. Do you mind if I ask you which of these apply to you, phrased as lacks of the privileges listed?:
You are seen as an abnormality, mentally deficient or disgusting person because you're straight.
You are less likely to get hired and more likely to be fired because you're straight.
You're not assumed to be the 'standard person' because of your skin colour.
You're more likely to be incarcerated, falsely accused of committing a crime, serving on average higher sentences than other people, and being the subject of police brutality because of your skin colour.
Not going through the whole list. Just trying to make a point, to be honest.
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 1:26 pm
Let's face the damn truth here. We all get fucking shit on for things we have no control over, and ain't it gonna change. The best we can hope for is a world were all races are shit on equally.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 1:48 pm
(December 27, 2014 at 10:19 am)Blackout Wrote:
Society often says that equality for all different groups of people is either being achieved or has already been achieved... Discussing and issuing this somewhat ignorant and false idea in western societies is what I intend to do in this thread. I've decided to make a non exhaustive list of the privileges I get simply because I was born straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male.
People frequently respond to these disadvantages by saying things like But white people or straight people are discriminated against too - First, this is not a competition to see who suffers more with racism or homophobia... Fine, being discriminated and prejudiced against is terrible, but white or straight people cannot be oppressed because they are the ones holding significant power over the media, economy, means of production and political offices in western societies - For oppression to exist, one group needs to possess social power over the disadvantaged group (and it doesn't need to be a minority) - That's something white people predominantly have (mostly males) and black people mostly don't. White people can be victims of racism but they can't be oppressed and the problem isn't anywhere as serious as racism against people of colour. This small parallelism is just an example and it's not by any means exhaustive.
Here's a list, with no particular order, of the privileges I get simply because I was born unwillingly like this:
1 - For being straight:
- I'm not seen as an abnormality, mentally deficient or disgusting person because I'm straight, or simply as someone different (highlight for the popular comments of straight females saying it is a waste when a specific hot male is gay)
- I'm not less likely to not get hired or be fired because I'm straight
- I don't need to come out of the closet because most people share the same sexual orientation as me and I can comfortably talk about it with them
- Religions don't consider my sexual orientation as sinful and an abomination
- I'm not mocked, ridiculed or discriminated over something I have no control over, this includes insults, social discrimination and prejudice, and even crimes committed against gay people
- People don't comment on specific sexual practices I might have as a straight person (i.e. Anal sex between gay men, as if all gay men had only anal sex)
- I have full equality legally when it comes to both adoption and marriage
- I'm not assumed to be less of a man because I'm straight
- I'm not associated with idiotic stereotypes like being more effeminate, or having a specific haircut, or wearing pink/girly clothes
- Media represents straight people well and there isn't a news coming out everytime a celebrity tells someone she/he is homosexual
- My sexual orientation isn't assumed to not exist, like bisexuality or asexuality, and those are frequently associated with stereotypes like bisexuality being just in the closet homosexuality
Note - All the same principles apply to lesbians by analogy, with some adaptations
2 - For being white:
- I'm assumed to be the standard person because of my skin colour, and other people are seen as exceptions and determined or identified by their skin colour, while I'm just assumed to be a person and I am identified by my personality
- I'm not more likely to be incarcerated, falsely accused of committing a crime, serving on average higher sentences than other people, and being the subject of police brutality
- I'm not assumed by society to be either a criminal, a poor person or a welfare queen
- I don't constantly hear jokes, sometimes annoying or offensive, about white people and stuff white people do
- I make on average a higher salary because I'm white, and I'm more likely to get a decent job or be hired at all
- No one forces me to not grow my natural hair at a socially acceptable length since it is not afro (Seriously black people have been fired for not changing their natural hairstyle)
- I don't hear a wide amount of stereotypes about my ethnicity, from the most insignificant like You must know how to dance because you're black to the most serious
- There's good media representation of me, the media doesn't sensationalize a news everytime a white person commits a crime, and most film, series and other forms of art protagonists and characters are white and don't fit into stupid stereotypes like the ghetto nigga' or the nerdy asian
- My race is not used as an objectified form of fetish to please others (i.e. People who say they have a thing for black people, they only date that specific group because they are black, and not because of who they might be as people) - Just watch asian or ebony porn to get a better glimpse
3 - For being cisgender:
- I'm not considered an abnormality, a freak of nature because I'm comfortable with the sex I was born with
- I'm not marginalized, prejudiced against and wrongly represented in the media
- I don't have a much harder time getting a job or getting promoted
- I don't hear mean misinformed stereotypes about me like you're just confused or insults like Trans are just gross yuck!
- I'm not judged by the entire society, from conservatives to even liberals, as someone who is not worthy of the same respect or equality as others
- Media representations of cisgender people are good and accurate, not stupid or non existent
4 - For being middle class:
- I'm not assumed by others to be lazy, and I'm not constantly blamed for being the responsible of my financial/economical situation
- I have enough money to afford a decent education and have good prospects for my future because I don't live in a segregated urban area
- I'm not constantly blamed for Gross Domestic Product drops
- Other people don't tell me I'm lucky to even receive a minimum wage
- Most importantly, I have food, water, clothing, shelter and basic human needs fully satisfied without needing government assistance and consequently being judged or discriminated against because of it
- There's not dumb stereotypes about me, such as poor people are less educated they probably can't even read
5 - For being thin (Note - I'm actually 5kg overweight but I'm still inside the norm)
- I'm not assumed to be unhealthy just because I'm thin, even if in fact I sit by the couch watching TV all day long and never exercise
- My health problems aren't automatically linked to my body fat, because apparently being fat is the cause to all diseases someone might have (irony)
- I'm not less likely to get hired, to have a well paid job, in the US I don't pay higher health insurance, I'm not less likely to be considerable a credible witness in court
- I'm not insulted, laughed at or advised (diets) by others randomly because I'm fat
- My body is usually not an object of fetish, and it also isn't considered disgusting and sexually joked at
- I'm not assumed to be lazy just because I'm thin, as if physical activity is the only determinant factor to say if someone is lazy or not
6 - For being male:
- When I make a mistake or do something wrong, chances are no one will say the cause of it is the fact I'm a male
- Media representations of me don't produce shallow characters that only serve the roles of husbands or sons or fathers, who are weak and submissive or annoying/useless - In fact, forms of art and entertainment don't constantly portray me as sex objects meant to be used and commercials don't objectify male bodies, I'm depicted as powerful, strong and manly and not as submissive or passive, with highlight on body parts
- I make better wages than women, occupy most of CEO jobs, media director positions, executive and political offices
- I don't have females creating laws to control my body
- I don't have to worry about the fact that I either can't get a safe or affordable abortion, or being discriminated and prejudiced if I did get an abortion and people knew about it
- I'm less likely to suffer domestic violence, be raped or be victim blamed
- I'm not attributed inferior gender roles like being passive, submissive, docile, nice, caring, or obligated to have kids - Instead I'm attributed characteristics like aggression, strength and I'm encouraged to financial and personal success, I'm not seen as weird if I don't have kids
- I'm not slut-shamed by females or by other men - If I dress revealing clothes the most that will happen is to be called provocative, crazy, or thug if my clothes are associated with criminal activity but I'll never be called bitch, slut, whore... and other similar insults
- I'm not less likely to get the job if I have the exact same qualification as a female counterpart, and I'm not paid less for the same job
- Society doesn't encourage males to hate, slut shame or compete between each other fiercely, on the contrary, it incentives men to be friends and support each other, to not see other men as their enemy and rivals, and so I don't have to worry every other men will be starring at what I dress or how I behave
- I'm not forced into a culture that places an overwhelmingly high value on my physical appearance, portrayed by impossible and unrealistic media depictions that causes depression, anger or mental issues, eating disorders and so on - I'm not taught that my value is based on how pretty I look but rather on how successful I am
- I don't constantly hear jokes or stereotypes about me, from the less serious like You women are really crazy to other more mean like You drive an expensive car? Your husband must have bought it for you
---» A combination of two or more of characteristics or social statuses that don't fit the standard will result on higher discrimination, i.e. A black, lesbian female poor person will experience much more discrimination than a white straight middle class female (for example women of colour make even less wages than white women)
These lists are not meant to be exhaustive, or to create an hierarchy of severity - The privileges I get are not ordered by importance, it's completely randomized - This is just meant to demonstrate how social oppression, prejudice, discrimination and power still exist with simply daily facts and events to others that occur rarely (but still happen).
Feel free to comment, debate, discuss or add something more, I'll enjoy the feedback
Note - Ethnicity and race are used by me as synonym, as it is common amongst Europeans and European legislation.
I think you should calculate the monetary value of your privileges and give that amount to a non white, gay, female, ect neighbor of yours. It's the only decent thing you can do.
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 4:27 pm
(December 29, 2014 at 10:26 am)Blackout Wrote:
(December 29, 2014 at 1:10 am)CapnAwesome Wrote: Privileged Liberal White People are the only ones who give half a rats ass about privilege.
Where did you get that idea? I'm not even considered a liberal by my country's standards, in fact I like capitalism. Perhaps because it's impossible to keep track of how many people of either group talks about privilege it's unreasonable to say that only the privileged group is the one talking about it... There are many liberal whites who don't care about privilege.
There are many reasons why a group doesn't speak about privilege or lack of thereof, it's not because it doesn't exist.
I didn't say it didn't exist or that all liberals care about it, but I never hear any other group bring it up, much less with the regularity of white liberals. That white guilt must be a hell of a thing.
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 8:16 pm (This post was last modified: December 29, 2014 at 8:17 pm by Dystopia.)
I don't understand your definition of white guilt - It's not about white guilt and I made that very clear from the beginning. I'm happy being a white guy. However it seems to be you're committing a fallacy by making the validity of the argument depend on the person who's spitting it out - Lincoln was against slavery and he was white, right? Does that make the opposition to slavery invalid, just because he wasn't black/slave?
Have you ever thought that just maybe there are a number of reasons other racial groups (we are talking about race right now so I'll address this only) don't talk about lacking privilege is because they may have given up, or learned to live with their disadvantages? Or perhaps because they are aware that many people would give more credit to the complaint if it was proposed by a white person? These kind of assumptions are dangerous.
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 8:38 pm
(December 29, 2014 at 8:16 pm)Blackout Wrote: I don't understand your definition of white guilt - It's not about white guilt and I made that very clear from the beginning. I'm happy being a white guy. However it seems to be you're committing a fallacy by making the validity of the argument depend on the person who's spitting it out - Lincoln was against slavery and he was white, right? Does that make the opposition to slavery invalid, just because he wasn't black/slave?
Have you ever thought that just maybe there are a number of reasons other racial groups (we are talking about race right now so I'll address this only) don't talk about lacking privilege is because they may have given up, or learned to live with their disadvantages? Or perhaps because they are aware that many people would give more credit to the complaint if it was proposed by a white person? These kind of assumptions are dangerous.
I don't care about committing logical fallacies anymore. No matter what you type on a message board, somebody will call it a logical fallacy. So that holds no water with me. Learned to live with their disadvantage? I mean it just all sounds ridiculous. I doubt that normal people really stress over all the ways they are advantaged and disadvantaged. Also you can say that it's not about guilt, but the whole opening post is riddled with guilt. It sort of is like the inverse of when someone says 'I'm not a racist but.....' 'This isn't about white guilt but.....' Maybe that's not your intention or motivations, but it sure seems like it.
RE: My privilege as a straight, white, cisgender, middle class thin male
December 29, 2014 at 8:57 pm (This post was last modified: December 29, 2014 at 8:58 pm by Dystopia.)
(December 29, 2014 at 8:38 pm)CapnAwesome Wrote:
(December 29, 2014 at 8:16 pm)Blackout Wrote: I don't understand your definition of white guilt - It's not about white guilt and I made that very clear from the beginning. I'm happy being a white guy. However it seems to be you're committing a fallacy by making the validity of the argument depend on the person who's spitting it out - Lincoln was against slavery and he was white, right? Does that make the opposition to slavery invalid, just because he wasn't black/slave?
Have you ever thought that just maybe there are a number of reasons other racial groups (we are talking about race right now so I'll address this only) don't talk about lacking privilege is because they may have given up, or learned to live with their disadvantages? Or perhaps because they are aware that many people would give more credit to the complaint if it was proposed by a white person? These kind of assumptions are dangerous.
I don't care about committing logical fallacies anymore. No matter what you type on a message board, somebody will call it a logical fallacy. So that holds no water with me. Learned to live with their disadvantage? I mean it just all sounds ridiculous. I doubt that normal people really stress over all the ways they are advantaged and disadvantaged. Also you can say that it's not about guilt, but the whole opening post is riddled with guilt. It sort of is like the inverse of when someone says 'I'm not a racist but.....' 'This isn't about white guilt but.....' Maybe that's not your intention or motivations, but it sure seems like it.
You seem to be implying that everything can be a logical fallacy, but it's not really like that - A fallacy allows a judgement/argument to look true when it really isn't - The problem is that you're saying discussing privilege is not valid if white people (the privileged group) are the only ones doing it - Who's discussing it is completely irrelevant, what matters is if what's being said is true or not - For instance, wouldn't it be valid for a group of men to discuss abortion, even if they are not women? It's perfectly valid as long as they take into account they'll never be having abortions during their lifetimes. If people followed your idea, then we could say more than 90% of theist arguments are perfectly valid and fallacy free. Only that they're not.
I don't care what it looks like, it's ridiculous to say I have white guilt or male guilt or straight guilt when those are characteristics I was born with and have literally no control over - There's no reason for me to feel guilty. My whole opening post was aimed at exposing the fact that I'm perfectly aware of the advantages I possess for simply being born like I was, and if I'm claiming to have undeserved privilege it's because I've carefully looked at both sides and noticed my life was a lot easier than others for no justified reason - And honestly, I'd have to be a total fool and overwhelmingly oblivious to say other groups (like the ones I mentioned, but it varies according to each society) have an equal or easier life than me as a general rule(I'm not claiming it's always easier for me, there are some exceptions). This is also not about people thinking about advantages or disadvantages, everyone has them - It's about advantages or disadvantages that are socially determined by irrelevant factors such as your sexual orientation or your skin colour.
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you