On my birthday in 2007, I was on the verge of taking my own life. After 4 hours of considering, I aborted it, because there was too much danger of survving an attempt, and thus winding up disabled in a way I could never prepare for. Think about that. And talk with someone.
"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring." - Carl Sagan