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What to do when they knock on your door.
#7
RE: What to do when they knock on your door.
I have a sign by my door that says "No Soliciting". 
My neighborhood is pretty good.  Folks call the police on religious groups. (ha!)  Some get through.  I usually tell them that I'm not interested.  If they persist, I'll tell them something, depending on how pleasant they seem.  Good = "I'm an organist at a Catholic Church, but thanks for your time."  Pushy: "I'm a Druid, I pray to trees and cast spells.  Have a nice day."  (I never, ever say "atheist". That's just like waving a red cape at a bull. No thanks.)
       But there was this one guy who wouldn't stop.  He ignored me when I pointed out the "No Soliciting" sign, and told him that this also applied to religious "witnessing".  He just got louder, he was obnoxious. He had his (probably 3-year-old) son with him.  So when he paused for breath, I said "Preacher, huh.  I see you brought your little fuck-buddy with you.  How nice for you."  As he gasped and took a step back, I pulled the shotgun out from behind the door and screamed, "Get the hell off of my property, baby raper."  I barely managed to keep a straight face when he grabbed the boy and RAN down my driveway.  

Yes, I channeled my mother.  It was totally worth it.   Angel
"The family that prays together...is brainwashing their children."- Albert Einstein
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Messages In This Thread
What to do when they knock on your door. - by Expired - February 17, 2016 at 6:47 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jenny A - February 17, 2016 at 7:04 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Cecelia - February 17, 2016 at 7:08 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by drfuzzy - February 17, 2016 at 7:13 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by MTL - February 17, 2016 at 8:40 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by vorlon13 - February 17, 2016 at 8:07 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by drfuzzy - February 17, 2016 at 10:47 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Minimalist - February 17, 2016 at 8:42 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by brewer - February 17, 2016 at 9:14 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Regina - February 17, 2016 at 9:29 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Ravenshire - February 17, 2016 at 9:51 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jackalope - February 17, 2016 at 10:38 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by MTL - February 17, 2016 at 11:10 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jackalope - February 17, 2016 at 10:43 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by lisah - February 17, 2016 at 10:47 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Aroura - February 17, 2016 at 10:51 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by vorlon13 - February 17, 2016 at 11:16 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Edwardo Piet - February 17, 2016 at 11:16 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by drfuzzy - February 18, 2016 at 10:04 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jackalope - February 18, 2016 at 3:02 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by robvalue - February 18, 2016 at 3:13 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by robvalue - February 18, 2016 at 3:17 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by robvalue - February 18, 2016 at 3:20 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by robvalue - February 18, 2016 at 4:16 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Gawdzilla - February 18, 2016 at 6:35 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by MTL - February 18, 2016 at 7:44 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Gawdzilla - February 18, 2016 at 8:48 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by LastPoet - February 18, 2016 at 9:02 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Gawdzilla - February 18, 2016 at 9:23 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by abaris - February 18, 2016 at 11:04 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by vorlon13 - February 18, 2016 at 1:15 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jenny A - February 18, 2016 at 1:51 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Jackalope - February 19, 2016 at 3:58 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Edwardo Piet - February 18, 2016 at 11:19 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by robvalue - February 19, 2016 at 4:20 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Joods - February 19, 2016 at 5:56 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Mermaid - February 19, 2016 at 9:09 am
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by dyresand - February 20, 2016 at 2:53 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by Expired - February 27, 2016 at 7:11 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by J a c k - February 27, 2016 at 7:53 pm
RE: What to do when they knock on your door. - by vorlon13 - February 27, 2016 at 9:19 pm

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