(February 22, 2016 at 11:20 am)LadyForCamus Wrote:(February 22, 2016 at 9:54 am)Nymphadora Wrote: For me, given all the shit I've dealt with IRL, I just could no longer believe that such a loving god would allow the continual suffering of certain situations. I asked so many questions and the answers I received were never really answers at all. Maybe people are driven to have faith or believe through some internal fear. Maybe they have questioned it like myself, but are afraid to take that leap into just accepting that there is no god, simply because that fear is stuck in their head and they are focused on the "what if" instead of focusing on the reality.
As for myself, there is nothing in any supposed after life that could be so horrible as the hell I have been put through here on earth. A prime example is the fact that my ex has unjustly used parental alienation for the last 17 months to keep my oldest daughter who is now 20, and deemed incapacitated by the courts, away from me. I cannot get closure from this. Knowing that she is less than five miles away and I have zero access to her, is literally killing me inside. I have suffered the death of my twins, 25 years ago. I have closure from that. But not seeing a child that is still living and not being given any reason for it, you can't get closure from that. There is no relief. This is my hell. Why an "all loving, all powerful" god would let this go on, I have no words for.
I cannot believe in an imaginary creature and I am amazed at the number of people who, despite their own personal struggles with life things, still believe that such a creature is kind and loving. I cannot wrap my head around that at all. So I blame that internal fear they have. Perhaps they think that if they stop believing, their life will somehow get worse? Maybe they can't get it into their heads that because there is no god, they are 100% accountable for everything they do and that there really isn't a "god plan". Maybe it's some sort of comfort issue with them. I don't know. I honestly don't think anyone has all the answers because we are all individuals and for those that do believe, their answers will vary.
I'm so very sorry for your personal tragedy. I can't imagine what it must be like to lose babies. Well, I can imagine...I have an 18 month old. But if only imagining it is indescribably awful, then what you've actually experienced must feel beyond words. If this world were actually governed by some being doling out justice no child would ever suffer, and no mother would ever have to suffer the agony of losing her baby...☹️
This. Having the awesome opportunity to raise a special needs child for 18 years then to have her ripped away with no explanation is truly heartbreaking. I get through each day but it's difficult. I cry a lot. I suppose I could fill a lake by now with all of the shed tears.
Disclaimer: I am only responsible for what I say, not what you choose to understand.
