The Problem with Christians

[scoobysnack]

There biggest problem is that they are too nice, and don't sway from moral absolutes. On Tuesdays I identify as a dog, and demand everyone bow to my demands and take me on walks every two hours while at work, but no one will help me so I'm forced to poop and pee on the floor which is just embarrassing, and in a way I feel I'm the victim. As a result I've started howling at the beautiful women that walk by my office, and every time they look at me like I'm the one offending them, I lift my leg and mark my territory to dominate everyone I come in contact with. Although I tend to scoot my ass across the floor to the vending machine which is not built for dogs so I have to submit to human privilege once again, I still manage to hold my tongue, until it's time to lick my ass.