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Increased door-knocking...
#30
RE: Increased door-knocking...
(April 20, 2011 at 2:09 pm)Doubting Thomas Wrote: I used to get a bunch of religious junk mail from some "church" in Oklahoma that always exhorted me to send in money so I could get rich, because if I sent them money, somehow God would reward me. After I sent back a few polite requests in their pre-paid envelopes to not send me any more of their crap, I started printing out the most disgusting porn images I could find and mailing them back. Eventually the mail stopped.

I keep getting mail from St. Matthew's church in Tulsa. The envelope contains a "prayer rug" (actually a piece of paper with a picture of Jesus) that you're instructed to use and then send back to them in their postage paid envelope. They also send a flyer with all kinds of idiotic testimonials from people declaring how the "prayer rug" brought them money, health, a job, a house, etc, etc...

I always plaster the "prayer rug" with pictures of dicks that I cut out of porn magazines. My favorite bit is to make it look like Jesus is giving somebody a blow job with jizz dribbling down his chin. It's fun to imagine some old lady at this church opening my returned envelope and getting the surprise of her life. "Oh, Agnes! Look what somebody did to Jesus!"

ROFLOL

Science flies us to the moon and stars. Religion flies us into buildings.

God allowed 200,000 people to die in an earthquake. So what makes you think he cares about YOUR problems?
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Messages In This Thread
Increased door-knocking... - by Ace Otana - April 12, 2011 at 7:42 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Skipper - April 12, 2011 at 8:07 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by fr0d0 - April 12, 2011 at 8:37 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by chatpilot - April 12, 2011 at 8:38 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Ace Otana - April 12, 2011 at 8:49 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by OnlyNatural - April 12, 2011 at 11:35 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by reverendjeremiah - April 12, 2011 at 12:19 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Rwandrall - April 12, 2011 at 4:13 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Autumnlicious - April 12, 2011 at 7:13 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Faith No More - April 12, 2011 at 11:37 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Jax - April 12, 2011 at 11:54 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by KichigaiNeko - April 14, 2011 at 5:22 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Cinjin - April 12, 2011 at 11:59 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by veire - April 13, 2011 at 8:52 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Welsh cake - April 14, 2011 at 2:49 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Rainydays - April 20, 2011 at 7:27 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by thesummerqueen - April 20, 2011 at 8:42 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Ace Otana - April 20, 2011 at 9:51 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by thesummerqueen - April 20, 2011 at 9:53 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Ace Otana - April 20, 2011 at 10:00 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by thesummerqueen - April 20, 2011 at 10:04 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Ace Otana - April 20, 2011 at 10:12 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Minimalist - April 20, 2011 at 12:35 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by reverendjeremiah - April 20, 2011 at 12:42 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Minimalist - April 20, 2011 at 12:43 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Anomalocaris - April 20, 2011 at 1:41 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Doubting Thomas - April 20, 2011 at 2:09 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Thor - April 20, 2011 at 4:04 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Thor - April 20, 2011 at 3:40 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by thesummerqueen - April 20, 2011 at 3:45 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Doubting Thomas - April 21, 2011 at 10:12 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Thor - April 21, 2011 at 10:26 am
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Doubting Thomas - April 21, 2011 at 11:46 pm
RE: Increased door-knocking... - by Thor - April 22, 2011 at 9:23 am

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