How the fuck is there a statute of limitations for rape in New York?

[Drich]

It's a flower garden Trich grew shortly after we were married, and she was taken off to rehab. At that point my family had turned on me for supporting her recovery, and not getting a divorce. (big trailer park type shouting match where my dad tried to have me arrested from drugs, because he was sure if "she was on em he was on em.")

 Between those two things and everything else going on at the time I finally broke down and prayed for mercy.. I could only mutter two words... God, Mercy... Over and over.. That one sunflower grew taller than my house and bloomed into a basket ball sized monster.. (Sunflowers were my wife's fav flower, i had to take a pic of it because she was 2 weeks into a month long rehab less than a month from our wedding day) from that day forward it started to get better.

I use it here as a reminder, that no matter how dark you guys get, it is nothing compared to what God has already carried me through.

We may have our differences and I may feel very disappointed in the manner in which you addressed Judi's situation, but that does not take away either one of our humanities. 

I am very sorry for what you went through in your past. I hope you are in a better place now.

come on don't fall into the false narrative.

Time line the events:
I come in page three post 25 with
"if it took more than 5 years to report (in ny) then it was not rape. (again according to the law)"

Then post 27 Nym pipes up with a list of hypotheticals that to me seem like came from a hallmark movie.
So I then challenged her hypothetical to see if she would somehow justify her remarks.. Again i have worked with rape victims in a variety of different capacities and again had to deal with my own situation.. while i believe NYM is entitled to her own brand of grieving. my experience with dealing with people is one, people who have endured this sort of thing are not so flippant about it. In my 4 years here and all the different times i could have pulled the sexual abuse card to prove a point this is the first time I went into any measurable detail. I have often mentioned it as a 'dark time that caused me to atheism.' or i may have mentioned here or on another site that I have 'experienced something similar.'

Couple that with the years of feed back from years of working with kids and adults who were raped/molested as a child. In all that time the only people who would just off the cuff tell you about a rape that they themselves never reported were the people who may flipantly change a consent status on a given sexual encounter based on how they feel about a given person on any given day. The people the SoL is designed to weed out. (you can NOT pretend these people do not exist)

So I pressed.

Which is the only tool i have at my disposal with any of you. i can't look you in the eye, i can't judge body language, I can't even take your word based on past conversations. All I can do to discern truth is to press and measure a guttural reaction against what i know to be the accurate behavior of the people I've worked with given a specific situation.

Because that last thing I want to do is cut/wound myself over the shark tank and jump in if this person is obviously faking. But it is something I am willing to do if this person really needs help. Which is why in every other post from the emoji post to this one i have been identifying and laying out different options. i have been doing my due diligence outlining my position and other options for recovery.


The worst thing pressing would have done is to kick off the idea that she is ok and doesn't need some sort of help. You may not like it but sometimes you need to rip off a kids festering bandaide (even if they want to keep it) and treat the wound.

If Nym is for real and just happens to be one of the 1% who can march out a rape story to play to a crowd of people and win an argument but cant bring herself to report it to protect a sister then she needs to understand that metric she is living by is a psychological time bomb just waiting to go off...

And not to blame the victim.. but in the first story she was first raped @ 25 and in a later post it seems if she is just a little girl protecting her sister from her father...(post 112)