Funny things your kids say

[Thumpalumpacus]

This isn't anything my son said -- I was nine years old when this happened, and I still get laugh out of my incomprehension. It happened when I lived in Iran:

One Sunday we were off as usual to Mass, the sacraments of which were denied us Baptist heathens. Kerry was driving me up the wall the entire thirty minute ride to services, but quietly, so that his mom didn’t realize anything was amiss. The whole trip was one long exercise in annoyance, and given my then-recent efforts at controlling my temper at my parents’ prodding, it was a miracle we didn’t have a scrap in the car. So we get into Mass, and the priest is well into delivering his homily, and Kerry is still giving me grief under his breath, and so finally my patience wears out and I yell at the top of my voice: “SHUT UP!”

You could have heard angels dancing on the head of a dropping pin, right then.

Man, his mother grabbed me by the ear -- literally -- took me outside, and beat my ass.

I had no idea!