My mom is dying, going to need an ear.

[Brian37]

Now Sunday, still shocked and numb and spent. At a loss for words now too. Right now want to dry my cloths and call mom to let her know I'll be over after they dry. Mom is still here, I a desperately want to believe she is still here and nothing has happened. I hate this new reality.

We haven't always gotten along, and I've been total bitch to you in the past...but you're in my thoughts Brian. I hope you feel better soon.

If there is anything my mom is, her great quality is that we never stay mad at each other. There have only been in my life a couple of people I completely cut off, and not out of hate, but out emotional necessity for my own sanity. So when you, other atheists or theists yell at me or I yell at you, I know that it is just words, just like when my mom and I yell at each other, it never stays that way. With everyone here it is simply about the logic. With my mom, it is always knowing she loves me and we never stay angry at each other. 

My mom is amazing in that respect. We are alot like Howard and his mom on Big Bang. I am even going to miss her yelling at me "stop it", "shut up", "just do it", "you worry to much". Especially when she is going through not feeling well, it always makes me feel she is fighting it.

Never stay angry never hold grudges. Mom is always like that.