(September 21, 2017 at 9:09 pm)Court Jester Wrote: Fuck. I just saw this thread. I'm a bit behind the times Brian, but my condolences for the loss man. A true friend is tough to let go of regardless of the blood line.
Doesn't matter who you are, when you love family that much it always hurts. But I still have my memories of her and she would not want me to be miserable and sad forever. She would want me and I do, to think about the good times and the fun we had together.
Our favorite thing to do was simple, go shopping at the dollar store. Sounds mundane to many, but it was fun for us because we'd be silly with each other. One of the things she would do is go down the kids toy isle and offer to buy me a toddlers toy just to tease me. She's also pick up a religious themed item knowing I am an atheist and offer to buy it for me. I'd laugh and roll my eyes. It was her way of saying she loved me.
Sometimes while we were there and I would get one up on her, she would playfully raise her voice, and I would laugh and shush her. She was only joking but what would it look like if she shouted everybody comes running and sees an old lady in a scooter screaming. I would joke back, "Are you trying to get me arrested?" She would give me a playful fake smile and respond, "Not little ol innocent me."
We had silly car games we would play passing the golf courses where we lived. She'd sit in the back of the van, the game was I would say, "FOUR", then she would say another number to which I would have to subtract to get back to 4. The game was she could not repeat the same number.
Sometimes to be silly while driving I'd say, "Count the trees". Which is impractical especially while moving. But she'd playfully answer with some number.
On longer trips she knew I hate heights but would joke with me about cell towers and say something like, "Hey go change the light at the top of that tower."
And 12 years ago when I first moved down here, we'd thumb wrestle but she was always big cheat and would end up grabbing my thumb with her free hand to either smush it down or bend it back. She was strong too and sometimes when she did that bending backwards it would hurt.
And how many moms would play table top football waiting for food at a restaurant with adult son? My mom would double tap the football knowing that was not the rule, and I would push the football back as a penalty and she would laugh.
Just simple things like that. But the most amazing thing about her after she decided not to do anything more, was her courage. Even in her last days she tried to keep my spirits up. I know that the night before she died, she stuck around that last night, because I had to go home, but kept telling her over and over, even though she was on heavy pain meds, that I would see her in the morning.
When she had moments of lucidity and i would try to get up to go to the bathroom or out to smoke, she would grab my thumb very tightly to get me to smile not wanting to let me go. I did smile but it was through tears knowing what was coming.
