RE: Does Anyone Else Ever Feel Like This...?
November 16, 2017 at 7:13 am
(This post was last modified: November 16, 2017 at 7:21 am by Edwardo Piet.)
Well the only time I seem to have any sense of what happiness actually is is when I know I am happy.
My experience is the exact opposite. It's impossible to be happy and not know it. The OP is about how the only time I know what happiness is is when I know I am happy. And I seem to have no sense of what 'happy' is supposed to even mean when I'm unhappy.
But that's the same thing.
These two statements are very different. When we ask if we are happy that's a sign of uncertainty and not knowing that we are happy. Knowing that we are happy is the opposite of asking if we are. I agree that asking if I am happy is a sign that I am not but believing and feeling certain that I am happy is a sign that I really am happy because that conviction itself feels good.
The OP is about how the conviction that I'm happy when I hold that conviction seems to be the only sense of happiness I understand. When I don't hold that conviction I can't even make sense of happiness because physically my body feels the same. I can be experiencing pleasure and not know I'm happy and I can be experiencing pain and know I am happy. The physicality of it seems irrelevant so when people talk about happiness having a certain physiology behind it like butterflies in their stomach I have no idea what they are talking about. Even when I was in love it was always a very mental conceptual thing for me. It's about valuing someone rather than feeling anything physically.
But contentment is definitely a poor substitute for happiness in my experience. I'm often content to settle for less and I'm far from happy. Content is more like comfort, and in my experience I'm at my happiest when I get out of my comfort zone and experience adventure rather than contentment. And I'm a huge introvert in many ways. After all most of the time I do stay in my comfort zone, and I am miserable.
(November 16, 2017 at 7:12 am)Mr.Obvious Wrote: No, I'm not saying its impossible to be happy and know it.
My experience is the exact opposite. It's impossible to be happy and not know it. The OP is about how the only time I know what happiness is is when I know I am happy. And I seem to have no sense of what 'happy' is supposed to even mean when I'm unhappy.
(November 16, 2017 at 6:45 am)Mr.Obvious Wrote: Our goal shouldn't be to strive for happiness, imho. Just try to remove and minimalize what actively makes you unhappy.
But that's the same thing.
(November 16, 2017 at 7:12 am)Mr.Obvious Wrote: No, I'm not saying its impossible to be happy and know it.
I'm saying that asking yourself: am I happy is a sign you are not.
These two statements are very different. When we ask if we are happy that's a sign of uncertainty and not knowing that we are happy. Knowing that we are happy is the opposite of asking if we are. I agree that asking if I am happy is a sign that I am not but believing and feeling certain that I am happy is a sign that I really am happy because that conviction itself feels good.
The OP is about how the conviction that I'm happy when I hold that conviction seems to be the only sense of happiness I understand. When I don't hold that conviction I can't even make sense of happiness because physically my body feels the same. I can be experiencing pleasure and not know I'm happy and I can be experiencing pain and know I am happy. The physicality of it seems irrelevant so when people talk about happiness having a certain physiology behind it like butterflies in their stomach I have no idea what they are talking about. Even when I was in love it was always a very mental conceptual thing for me. It's about valuing someone rather than feeling anything physically.
Quote:If you are content, you're not bound to put your own happiness into question.
But contentment is definitely a poor substitute for happiness in my experience. I'm often content to settle for less and I'm far from happy. Content is more like comfort, and in my experience I'm at my happiest when I get out of my comfort zone and experience adventure rather than contentment. And I'm a huge introvert in many ways. After all most of the time I do stay in my comfort zone, and I am miserable.
