Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist

[The Grand Nudger]

So, would it be fair to say, that in addition to educating women and young people with regard to the complexity of these various feelings and their implications during sexual encounters, it’s also important to be educating men (or any person in a position of power over others, to stay consistent with your comparison) about them as well?  Not every man in the world is going to be thoughtfully considering all of the above while he is smack dab in the middle of a blow job.

I;d be willing to wager that most men or women in the world aren't -thoughtfully- considering any of those things, the salient bit is that they are,m nevertheless, consuming their thoughts in the moment and producing inexplicable or unrelatable behaviors.  I;m sure we could come up with more, I doubt I've plumbed the depths of response to sexual predation of the criminal -or- just creepy kind.

Does that mean he’s a perv? 

I don't see why it would..but I also don't see the relevance to the events in consideration.  

In other words, do you think it would be fair to say that a little education in the other direction would go a long way in helping some men be more empathetic sexual partners...before we label them creeps and predators?  Or, do you think the person who is initiating the encounter should always intuitively understand all of these non-verbal feelings potentially at play?

To be clear, they're being labeled as such for creepy predatory behavior?  It would be preturnatural to pick up every cue..positive or negative.  It stretches my ability to believe a person when they say they could see absolutely -no- signs of a negative, though...when the events are what we have described to us....and in this case..she seems to recall giving repeated verbal cues in addition to the "non-verbal feelings potentially at play" which..in her case..sounded rather more like in effect, than potentially at play. If I had a night like that, with some girl mumbling that we were all the same and trying to halt the penis party every here and there...I'd have been -reaching- for a notarized consent form with her picture ID embossed and signed in her own blood. To me, the writing was on the wall. If he didn't notice it at all, but doesnt deny her version of events..and that's his suspisciously lawyerly claim.....then he might actually be a danger to himself or others as a genuinely oblivious sexual predator.

I think it's more likely that he's a garden variety creep...and at least to some extent he knows that. That he did notice her objections..and he felt that he overcame them in the pursuit fantasy he was obviously playing at.

Say, look what happens when we engage in open dialogue on a subject instead of letting the conversation get shut down by blanket accusations of victim blaming?  😏

Meh, lol.  

On the reas, though, my open dialogue on this one is that the difference between what ansari did and rape is one of degree, not category - off on a technicality. To see him the treated as the social or normative equivalent of a rapist is entirely unsurprising.  OJ got off too........guy wasn't guilty but we knew he did it, didn't we. He knew he did it too..lol.