On Hell and Forgiveness

[John V]

Why does god feel compelled to eternally punish only those folks who don’t love him back?

God's sense of justice requires that all sin be punished.

Why is that sin the only unforgivable one, and why isn’t it forgivable?

It's forgivable. None of us loved god back before salvation, and none of the saved are able to love god back as they should. Yet, we're forgiven.

I have heard of hell described by Christians as a “self-imposed exile.”  If I were to die tomorrow and realize I was wrong, and I begged god for forgiveness but he refused, how could my exile be considered self-imposed?  It’s not self-imposed if god is actively preventing me from being with him.

I agree, but the Bible doesn't say that this situation will occur, so it isn't applicable.

Two possibilities come to mind:

1. People who don't repent in this life won't repent in the next.

2. People do in fact get the chance to repent after death. There's some support for this Biblically, but it's not at all conclusive. 

Does god love the folks in hell?  If he does, and they are in agony for being separated from him, what logical or moral reason is there for god to keep them ostracized?  That sounds like the opposite of a forgiving god. It sounds to me like someone who holds grudges.

This is a false dichotomy. To say that god is forgiving doesn't imply that he must necessarily forgive everyone for everything.

Christians, would you do this to your own children?  If your child ran away, and came back a month later, filthy and in tears, saying, “mommy/daddy I miss you so much. I’m so alone and afraid. I’m sorry I left; I just want to come home and cuddle with you on the couch,” would you tell them it’s ‘too late’, and shut the door in their face for good?  Why or why not?

No, I wouldn't. As I noted earlier, from the parable of the prodigal son, we see that God wouldn't either.

Why is being loved back the most important thing to god; even more important than how we treat each other during life?  Even more important than how his chosen priesthood treat their children?

If we go by how we treat each other during life, we're all damned. You seem to be making the common error of trying to explain the fates of both the saved and the damned by a system of justice. As to justice, we're all condemned. Salvation is a function of mercy. Mercy is undeserved, and so can be given out on any basis. God feels that we should acknowledge the sacrifice of his Son, which makes the mercy possible, in order to recieve the mercy. That's his choice. There isn't necessarily a logical reason for it. There doesn't need to be.