Beating Children

[Jackalope]

Sorry, I just don't believe you can justify smacking a child anywhere on their body for any other reason than to save their very lives or from a painful accident. (ie. Shell B's water incident or in the unlikely even of Rhythm's grenade scenario ... you get the idea)

I can only speak from my own 9 1/2 years of parenting experience, as well as my experience of being a child myself. From my own perspective, I agree with what you're saying here - but also acknowledge my knowledge is limited to my experience.

My own son is a wonderfully intelligent, compassionate kid with a well-developed sense of the difference between right and wrong. I hope that's a result of good parenting. He's old enough and intelligent enough to listen to reason. When he makes mistakes, we talk. I talk, he listens, I hear what he has to say, and we talk through the situation. Yes, he often offers up the typical excuses a child his age will give, and when that happens, I make it clear to him that he's old enough to "man up" and take responsibility for his actions, good or bad, and that he'll earn respect for doing so.

I've never spanked or hit him in any way, nor can I recall ever yelling at him. Despite this, I know that he's afraid that I will get angry with him - which I think is a result of his mother's (my ex's) parenting style. As far as I know, she has spanked him on one occasion (a decision I do not agree with, as it was done out of frustration rather than to prevent a dangerous situation), and I know that her temper gets the best of her at time. His mother is his primary caregiver. This, I think has conditioned him to fear his parents' anger in response to mistakes - which I think is unfortunate. Better to adopt good behavior for it's own sake rather than out of fear.

By no means am I a perfect parent, nor am I qualified to criticize other non-abusive parenting styles - I have found that for me, understanding and speaking to my child's capacity for reason is a better choice than force or fear.