(July 7, 2019 at 4:43 pm)tackattack Wrote: I can see the peer pressure involved. I wouldn't threaten a coach, or even pull my child out of that circle. If that was the standard practice, and my son had a problem, we would discuss desire for conformity vs. standing for what you believe. I would teach him that not everything has to be a fight. You don't have to rail against the system to stand for what you believe. If it's not against your beliefs then accept it as the cost of social interaction if it doesn't harm you. You could stand silently, not take a knee, pick your nose. If it does harm or you can't stand idly by, withdrawal, because participation is optional. As a daddy bear, I would use it as a teaching tool for my child personally, not an opportunity to soapbox to the community.
In case I didn't mention it before, I do suffer from white male, religious privilege. That doesn't mean I can't put myself in other peoples shoes or practice thought experiments to better define my beliefs and clarify my positions. Instead of assuming I can't see this or that it's impossible for me to know that, how about you just spell out for me why in either your situation or my situation that it's not persecution to fire the coach. I understand that the boy may feel pressure to conform. That is part of the social contract for joining any group. Just as engaging in conversation risks being offended by it's engagement socially. I understand that it was not part of my written duties to have a huddle or prayer before taking the field.
Before we go really deep down the rabbit hole of did I or his peers discriminate against him for not conforming, why don't we try something different. Why don't I get an atheist to tell me of a specific example where they personally were oppressed or discriminated against. I'm certain that some have been passed over for a promotion or a job interview or some other type of direct discrimination.
Once again you are looking at this from a position of privilege. I'm not saying this to denigrate you. All I'm trying to do is inform you. You don't know what it's like to be marginalized, so you still look at things from your perspective of privilege.
As a female atheist, I've definitely felt marginalized. Have I ever faced discrimination? No. Do you know why? Because the only people who know I'm an atheist are my husband, my kids, and a select number of friends who are either athiests or atheist-friendly. And I even feel marginalized by the atheist community. Not here, mind you, this place has been nothing but wonderful. But guys like Richard Dawkins and Sam Harris? They don't represent me. They call me and other women like me 'illogical', and tell us to worry more about what's going on in the middle east than in our own communities -- because apparently they're very fond of the fallacy of relative privation. Apparently they can be illogical too. I'm sure many male atheists have felt marginalized too. Many of them may feel uncomfortable coming out except where they feel comfortable with other atheists. I can't speak for them, because i don't have their experience. I know that it's difficult to imagine what it's like to be marginalized. To miss out on a host of opportunities because of who you are. It's easy from a position of privilege to look at it and say "This is how people should act, this is how I would act if I were in their shoes." when you've never had to actually walk a mile in their shoes.
It's like how people say "The gender of the President shouldn't matter." No, it shouldn't. But don't think for a second little girls don't grow up recognizing that there has never been a female President. I know for a fact I did. So never in my 34 years of life did I ever imagine becoming President. And my daughters look up at them and see the same thing. And though I tell them "Yes, a woman can be President." Like I did as a child, they find it difficult to believe when it's never been done before.
Same thing goes with race. "Oh race doesn't matter." Then those same people say #NotMyAriel. "You can't change Ariel's race!" Nevermind all the characters who've been whitewashed throughout history. (Like Jesus. A white boy born in the middle east? Now that IS a miracle). They don't recognize that little black girls might like to see princesses who look similar to them. (Still waiting on my Latina Disney Princess. Even though I can pass for Caucasian). Same thing goes with Santa Clause (I'm looking at you Megyn Kelly. And BTW Megan is spelled with an A.) People might say "Well, make original characters" to which I throw up the picture of that little girl that says "Why not both?"
When you have privilege, it's not easy to see the complete picture from the other side. You might see parts, just as others with their own privileges see parts of the whole picture. But there's still a lot that's been missing. (And to be clear, I'm not comparing you to those groups, but using them as other examples)
You see the social risk as acceptable because you're on the side that has limited risk. Acceptance comes easy to you. That's not the case for everyone else. And when it comes to kids, acceptance is everything.
The whole tone of Church teaching in regard to woman is, to the last degree, contemptuous and degrading. - Elizabeth Cady Stanton
