Why do the Christians always hate sex so much?

[Tea Earl Grey Hot]

...Wanna know my sexual morality? It's simple: anything consenting adults choose to do is up to them. If they want to masturbate, that's cool. If they want to sleep around, as long as all their partners are informed about what's going on, I'm cool with swingers. Pedophilia is out because of that phrase consenting adults. Beastiality is out, too, simply because animals aren't able to communicate their consent.

We can have a bible study together if you like. I think there is ample scripture to show that committed monogamy between two opposite gender partners (living as one) works best.

That was always God's blueprint for happy families.

“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
(Genesis 2:24)

Maybe if you studied your bible from the perspective of modern historical criticism rather than systematic theology, you'd know that verse was likely a descriptive statement (i.e. the way things are), rather than a prescriptive statement (i.e. the way things should be). It's not there to promote modern monogamous marriage, but it's simply there as the conclusion of a story providing an explanation for the way things are (i.e. why do men like women, etc).