(January 7, 2013 at 6:09 pm)RichardP Wrote: It just seemed a bit hypocritical for him to stand up in front of the group and preach group "dating" while he did the standard dating himself. People in that group had gotten on my case because I had a "girlfriend" who I was just going on normal dates with. And no, at that time, I was not fooling around with her. They were honestly totally innocent dates.Christianity is not a "what is good for the goose is good for the gander" religion. It Never has been. throughout the writing of Paul, he seperates the Freedom Christ offers from those who do not understand or can not in good consciencous accept the freedom Christ offers. One of the more popular teachings on this is the "Meat offered to Idols." Paul tells us it is ok to eat this meat, but he says if a brother who was brought up in the tradition that meat offered to idols was sinful, and still believes this in light of this truth, then for Him it is a sin to eat of this meat. Subsequently it is also to eat this type of meat in his presents lest it causes him to sin. Paul goes on in other passages to teach this about all newly 'silent' areas of the bible including: Cleansing cermonies, Holy days, Marriage, Remaining single, Traditional unclean animals, and anything else that we do not have a direct "NT" Command.
I was a little annoyed. I was about the same age as him. What made me "less mature" of a Christian? Was it really any of their business? And I did not like that I was being viewed by them as "immature" -- almost like they were my superiors.
Apply this to his ablity to date. If for him it was a non issue then he has been granted the freedom to date. at the same time he was tasked to not set an example that some of you were not able to live up to. so keeping his private life private was the right thing to do.
That would be no different than your trainer being able to indulge in a peice of cake when at his home. But when he is at work helping you to get or maintain fitness, then it would be wrong for him to eat cake infront of you or even talk about it least it causes you to stumble.
Quote:You know I never heard any porn connection mentioned in any of the talks about the evils of masturbation.Some expressions of Christianity are like that, and others not so much.
Quote:Yeah but that can be true in any friendship.Indeed, so why start the Biggest 'friendship' you will ever be apart of and look to start out by taking or leaning on the other person?
Quote: Do you tell that to a new kid at school who hasn't made any friends yet? Pull him aside and explain that the problem is that he is too "needy" and if he were to make friends he would just end up taking from the other kids -- and not giving enough to the friendship? And he needs to learn to be happy, and not lonely, by himself before he goes seeking friends?Yes, and then you work with said kid to equip him with the tools to be content with whatever his situation.
Children who can not be alone grown into adults who can not be alone.
Quote:You are married. You have to know that a relationship is an ongoing thing -- just like eating.I was not talking about the relationship when speaking of 'eating.' You orginally said that you had an emptyness and was looking to fill it with a relationship. What I am trying to say is if you do not learn to fill yourself/find peace contentment before you enter your relationship, you will 'eat' or consume your partner, rather than help each other sustain one another.
Quote:I'm don't think that you should view yourself as "messed up" just because you really want to meet the right person and get married.Not what I said. What makes one "Messed up" is the idea that marriage will make you whole. Christians are as guilty of this as everyone else.
Maybe that is why their is no difference in the divorce rate.
