There is more than one way to heaven.

[Violet]

I can see the ad campaign now:

"Unsure if you are going to heaven? Want to make sure you can be rescued from purgatory or even hell if the unthinkable happens? Well now you can! With the afterlife+ insurance program you can eliminate the worry of meeting god's standard for living! After your tragic passing a team of experts will assess your situation through divine revelation and in the event of you not being where you want int he afterlife will negotiate with god the terms of your admittance to heaven, for the same price as a cup of coffee each week! But wait, there's more! Sign up with a partner and save 10%! Sign up the entire family for a %20 discount or an entire community or organisation for up to %50 off the advertised price! Now you never have to worry about yourself, your friends, your family or community suffering in hell for all eternity! Perfect Christmas gift for all of your Atheist, Gay and liberal loved-ones who are destined to an eternity of suffering - pick up the phone right now and never worry again about the prospect of an eternity of suffering!"

Hilarious Perhaps it would actually work... i wonder...