Q: do you, Christian, claim that God exists, rather than you believe that he exists?

[max-greece]

Huxley said: 'I had motive for not wanting the world to have a meaning; consequently assumed that it had none, and was able without any difficulty to find satisfying reasons for this assumption.'

Are you saying that is how you feel as well?

Not quite no.

I had no motive for either wanting or not wanting the world to have meaning in the grand sense.

If the earth did have a motive I would despair were it as banal as the one your religion offers (to praise a God that doesn't need it but demands it).

First I recognised there was no God.
Then I realized religion is just another word for slavery.
Then I was relieved.
In the absense of a God I understood there wouldn't be a "reason" for the world (in the sense that religion used it).
Then I realized that "the lack of a reason" equated exactly to true freedom.

I am an indivdual on a planet that has no pre-defined function. I exist. I chose, within the limits of the society that I live in, my reasons to justify my existence.

Those reasons - love, friendship, parenthood, music, good food, travel, knowledge, experience and many others are more than sufficient to justify my life to me. YMMV.

If the effect of how I live my life has no effect on the rest of the universe I couldn't care less. The grander the meaning you allocate the less meaning it actually has.

My meaning is entirely local to me and those around me who are affected by it.