Friends with benefits?

[*Deidre*]

I don't think I've ever met such a friend but I wound up with a few.

When I was dating I always felt I was ultimately looking for a partner. So I would do many things with the women I met like listen carefully to what they tell me about themselves, tell them honestly about me what they needed to know, have sex with them, explore humor with them, talk politics and philosophy with them, and explore the outdoors with them.

There were times when one or the other of us realized the connection wasn't strong enough to take further, but plenty of times we'd go on enjoying what we liked about the other until a better lead came along. I suppose you could call us friends with benefits during this phase of the relationship.

My current wife had a once a week arrangement with an old boyfriend Bud when we first met. I don't recall when I found that out but I didn't think anything of it. I wasn't connected with anyone at the time but I did have an ex-girlfriend who gave better blowjobs than a gay guy .. and really, really enjoyed doing it. Anytime I stopped by we both knew where it would end up. So at some point, when I felt strongly enough about where my current wife and my relationship was going, I mentioned how long it had been since I'd visited Ramona. That lead to sharing her special tastes and skills (she also played piano beautifully). It was very easy to agree we were ready to leave aside both Bud and Ramona and try being exclusive.

This story made me smile, I think falling in love the way you both did seemed effortless and therefore, genuine. I'm happy for you both. :-)