And now for a Pet the Dog moment for Catholicism....

[Rev. Rye]

The Vatican Forgives The Beatles, Now They Can Move On To Black Sabbath

Posted 3 hrs ago by Kyle Anderson in Music

Back in 1966, John Lennon cheekily declared that his band the Beatles had become so popular that they had become "bigger than Jesus." From that point forward, Lennon and the rest of the band became persona non grata around Catholic circles. Since this week represents the 40th anniversary of the band's dissolution, the Vatican has decided to let bygones be bygones. "It's true, they took drugs; swept up by their success, they lived dissolute and uninhibited lives," said Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano. "But, listening to their songs, all of this seems distant and meaningless. Their beautiful melodies, which changed forever pop music and still give us emotions, live on like precious jewels."

But it may be all for naught. For one, Ringo Starr isn't interested in absolution. ""Didn't the Vatican say we were satanic?" Starr said to CNN. "And they still forgive us? I think [the Vatican] has more to talk about than the Beatles." Since Ringo isn't interested in getting the Pope's approval, the Vatican should really consider going whole hog and forgiving the following bands.

Black Sabbath: "Sure, Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants thinking it was cocaine, but on the other hand, 'The Osbournes' was pretty funny."

Sinead O'Connor: "She may have torn up a photo of Pope John Paul II while performing on 'Saturday Night Live,' but when you listen to her music, you realize that her cover of 'Nothing Compares 2 U' totally rules."

Mötley Crüe: "We realize now that encouraging people to shout at the devil is actually a good thing. It's not like they're shouting with the devil or for the devil."

Marilyn Manson: "It turns out he didn't cause any high school shootings after all, and Mechanical Animals is totally underrated. However, we still can't find any reference to the 'God of F---' in either Testament."

Slayer: "Nope, you guys remain condemned."

Who says the Church never changes?