Well I guess the bubble popped. One moment things are generically stressful and life is bearable, the next moment I'm drinking too much and on my way to an six foot hole.
I recently went into the hospital last Wednesday because I was going to kill myself, started cutting again, and had violent thoughts. I was hoping to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital first but due to high blood sugar I ended staying in the medical ICU for nearly 48 hours where they diagnosed me with Type One Diabetes.
Then Friday they transfered me to the psychiatric hospital. Two days ago I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and have been prescribed two extra medications.
It's been rough but I'm finally starting to calm down. So here are some positives to the situation:
1) Created some space between my wife and I to mentally heal.
2) Allowed my wife and I to really connect during visitations better that we had in the past two months.
3) My father and I are now on speaking terms. I sayed sorry and he offered to pay for my treatment.
4) My suicidal thoughts and violent thoughts are now becoming controllable.
5) This hospitalization is putting me on the right foot to stop drinking and smoking so much.
6) My diabetes diagnosis will help me eat better and loose more weight..and hopefully live longer.
7) Next week I will be admitted to an eight week dialectic behavioral therapy program to help me with my disorder.
8) My diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder well paint a better picture of what is going on with me and allow for better treatment.
I'll be out of the hospital on Saturday. Time to focus on discharge and coping techniques.
I recently went into the hospital last Wednesday because I was going to kill myself, started cutting again, and had violent thoughts. I was hoping to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital first but due to high blood sugar I ended staying in the medical ICU for nearly 48 hours where they diagnosed me with Type One Diabetes.
Then Friday they transfered me to the psychiatric hospital. Two days ago I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and have been prescribed two extra medications.
It's been rough but I'm finally starting to calm down. So here are some positives to the situation:
1) Created some space between my wife and I to mentally heal.
2) Allowed my wife and I to really connect during visitations better that we had in the past two months.
3) My father and I are now on speaking terms. I sayed sorry and he offered to pay for my treatment.
4) My suicidal thoughts and violent thoughts are now becoming controllable.
5) This hospitalization is putting me on the right foot to stop drinking and smoking so much.
6) My diabetes diagnosis will help me eat better and loose more weight..and hopefully live longer.
7) Next week I will be admitted to an eight week dialectic behavioral therapy program to help me with my disorder.
8) My diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder well paint a better picture of what is going on with me and allow for better treatment.
I'll be out of the hospital on Saturday. Time to focus on discharge and coping techniques.
"Just call me Bruce Wayne. I'd rather be Batman."
